Antz

Platform: Game Boy Color

"Z," the movie's memorable protagonist voiced by actor Woody Allen, could be any old ant here.

Although no longer given much regard, the Dreamworks-led Antz was a much-hyped property in 1998. Fully rendered in, at the time, state-of-the-art CGI, the studio promoted the film as the future of animation while hoping, more privately, to blunt the always encroaching Disney machine. This meant a blitz of books, toys—and yes, video games!—to accompany the movie’s release.

Hence this, a mediocre retread of the movie’s main beats, distilled to ugly, 8-bit form. It’s a platformer of the typical licensed variety—functional but not particularly interesting—with the player bounding the protagonist Z around levels that play almost like reskinned duplicates of each other. Remember the funny nightclub scene from the film? It’s recreated here as a bunch of tunnels and shafts great for (inexplicably) collecting rings and hopping about. Remember the epic termite battle? It’s recreated here as a bunch of tunnels and shafts great for (again) collecting rings and hopping about. Once the proceedings reach outside the hive, a scant more variety is introduced, but by then it’s already too little, too late.

The 8-bit minimalism does it no favors, either, featuring well-animated but not particularly endearing takes on the title characters. Music is shrill and droningly repetitive, evoking none of the movie’s ambiance or charm. In fact, it’s only the game’s interstitial cutscenes that suggest any connection to the source material—these are usually well drawn and provide a gist of what the film is actually about.

Not good, but playable—fans might want a copy to complete their shrine of everything Antz, but otherwise, this is another license-based game rightfully snubbed.--D

Publisher: Infogrames

Developer: Planet Interactive

Release: Sept. 24, 1999

Genre: Platformer

Axelay

Platform: Super Nintendo

The Illis System has succumbed to an alien invasion, its fleet defeated save for one stubborn survivor—the righteous pilot of the powerful Axelay “stratafighter.” He must now go where no man has, penetrating the heart of the enemy armada to eliminate its mysterious leader. Hostile cityscapes, an aquatic underworld, even a lava planet alive with giant, airborne worms—the game’s six worlds are as diverse as they are lethal, packed with every imaginable danger. More noteworthy, however, is the dynamic perspective, which alternates between vertical and horizontal action to produce a shooter of unusually eclectic feel. The overhead levels are particularly immersive, tilting the view to simulate a perpetual horizon from which objects gracefully “fall” into being. The side-scrolling missions are less mesmerizing, benefitting instead from stronger level design and more straightforward confrontations. Indeed, the vertical stages’ dipped viewpoint leads to some cramped navigation and nebulous hit detection rarely felt in their left-to-right counterparts. The game’s selectable weapon system is similarly unique, allowing the ship’s pod, side, and bay compartments to be affixed with crucial add-ons. Initially, these armaments are rather bland—the “Straight Laser” fires a fireball-like volley, the “Round Vulcan” spreads bullets in a two-way spray, and the “Macro Missile” launches dual torpedoes at incoming foes. But newer weapons become available over time, and some, such as the all-penetrating “Wind Laser,” prove almost cathartic in their destructive fun. And yet, this idea of withholding arms seems a strange misstep, as it renders certain weapons unavailable, and thus wasted, for large swaths of the game. Fortunately, the game is more gracious in terms of challenge; sustaining damage merely causes the loss of the currently selected weapon. This equates to having a four-hit life bar, provided players switch to the next gun before being struck again. Instant respawns, extra lives, multiple difficulties, and added continues also keep the proceedings fair. Well-crafted graphics and a bold soundtrack elevate the action even further, but there’s no shaking the grounded truth—while half the game is stellar, the overhead sections fall just short of the stars.

Final Thoughts: Axelay is often deemed as being one of the SNES’s finest shooters. And with its massive bosses, slick use of Mode 7 effects, and surprising lack of slowdown, perhaps it deserves that distinction. And yet, when counterbalanced with its uneven level design, underwhelming animation, and nominal replayability, a newcomer might just second-guess that glowing praise. But no matter; Axelay remains a safe, reliable choice for any shooter fan stuck with only a Super Nintendo.--D

Publisher: Konami, Inc.

Developer: Konami Co., Ltd.

Release: September 1992

Genre: Shooter

The overhead levels show more spectacle and feel more epic, but the horizontally-scrolling stages play better overall.

The bosses, as in many a shooter, offer some of the most memorable moments.

Bomb Jack

Platform: Arcade

Like many early-‘80s arcade games, Bomb Jack is inexplicable in its premise. As a superhero (named Jack?), the player must launch himself around the screen, collecting (and presumably defusing) as many bombs as possible in a single bound. As he does so, enemies spawn and zip around after him, anxious to cancel his flight.

They will succeed.

This is due to “Jack,” despite his ‘super’ distinction, being a rather fragile hero. One hit from anything ends his pint-sized life, and he’s defenseless otherwise. All he can do is swerve through the air, slow his descent, or drop immediately back to a platform, all while maneuvering through swarms of flying saucers, golems that transform into ricocheting death orbs, and other nonsense. Fortunately, collecting bombs feeds a meter that, once full, releases a ‘P’ icon that flings itself around the arena. Snatching this “power-pellet” turns the enemies into defenseless, point-granting coins, affording the player a brief reprieve from the insanity.

The game is fun, but just briefly; the repetitive nature of the (often frustrating) gameplay becomes obvious after just a few stages—and since there’s a hundred of these deathtraps to suffer, most players will eventually curse and move on. An improved sequel—Mighty Bomb Jack—is the version worth trying today, with the NES iteration currently available on the Nintendo Switch on-line service.

But…is Bomb Jack a true single-screen platformer? He definitely jumps! There are platforms! The levels are contained in a single screen! That said, the game can also be likened to paddle/ball games like Breakout and Arkanoid in which a sphere must be propelled into stacks of blocks, “collecting” them, in a sense. Bomb Jack simply makes its hero both the paddle and the ball. Or rather, the game can be categorized with maze-games such as Pac-Man thanks to its “grab-the-bauble” and “dodge-the-monster” proceedings.

But assuming it’s indeed an SSP, and despite its own underwhelming nature, Bomb Jack at least reveals the versatility of the genre. Give it a try, then seek the sequel.--D

Publisher: Tehkan

Developer: Tehkan

Release: October 1994

Genre: Single-screen Platformer (sort of)

Filling the meter (with the x1 sitting inside) releases the 'P' icon seen at the bottom right corner of the first image. This turns all the baddies into coins for a few fleeting seconds (as seen in he second pic).

The backdrops are few and repeat without much continuity. Here, players can see the Tehkan (developer's) headquarters.

BurgerTime

Platform: Arcade

BurgerTime - Beaten Eggs
BurgerTime - Beaten Eggs
BurgerTime - Pepper Spray?
BurgerTime - Pepper Spray?
BurgerTime - Toppled Toppings
BurgerTime - Toppled Toppings

BurgerTime seems born of a former fast-food worker’s fever dream, one in which the condiments he once prepared have come to life…and want a piece of him instead. And considering the game’s developer, Akira Okimoto, had previously worked as a fry cook, this unseemly feeling isn’t altogether misplaced.

So, players control the harried Peter Pepper, a quick-order cook who must scurry across a series of catwalks/rafters, toppling slabs of meat and toppings down chutes to create platters of mega-burgers. Impeding his efforts are a slew of ever-encroaching enemies; Mr. Hot Dog, Mr. Pickle, and Mr. Egg all want poor Peter dead.

And, no doubt, these fiends have the advantage. Peter moves slowly, even stodgily, over the floors and up the ladders. And worse, he’s nearly defenseless, armed with only a few rattles of a pepper shaker (pepper spray?) that temporarily stuns the incoming monsters. He can also flatten the baddies by tumbling foodstuffs upon them, but even when successful, the mutant edibles always return. In classic fashion, Peter’s nightmare is perpetual—after completing six stages of increasingly taxing design, the cycle repeats, dooming Peter to an endless shift in which he might just become the secret meat.

Much like fast food in general, BurgerTime is tasty at first, but soon becomes cold, then gross, as players begin to notice the slow gameplay, stiff controls, and obnoxious, looping music. Better single-screen games certainly define the era and genre, but the question remains—does BurgerTime qualify as true single-screen platformer? Without an ability to jump (or even fall), probably not…but because its 1990 sequel, Super BurgerTime, does introduce true platforming along with a number of other mechanics, the original—the prototypal entry, one could argue—is tentatively granted the same classification.

Which is to say, despite its heritage, BurgerTime is a remarkably average, flavorless game.--D

Publisher: Bally Midway

Developer: Data East

Release: November 1982

Genre: Single-screen Platformer (kinda?)

BurgerTime - Enemy Cast
BurgerTime - Enemy Cast
BurgerTime - Opening Demo
BurgerTime - Opening Demo

There's not much story, but the game does a decent job explaining the basic goals and introducing the "cast."

Getting trapped is all too easy. Fortunately, the player can "pepper spray" his foes to escape, if only for a set number of times.

Congo Bongo

Platform: Arcade

Congo Bongo Stage 1
Congo Bongo Stage 1
Congo Bongo Meets Frogger
Congo Bongo Meets Frogger
Congo Bongo Against the Snakes
Congo Bongo Against the Snakes

If Sonic was Sega’s answer to Mario, then Congo Bongo was Sega’s answer to Donkey Kong. Superficially, the games’ similarities are undeniable—in both, a man must jump and clamber and climb to reach an unruly ape. In the former, the beast tosses hazardous coconuts; in the latter, barrels.

But there is a key difference. While Donkey Kong cribs from the film King Kong, reenacting timeless “beauty and the beast” and “knight saving the princess” themes via an unlikely carpenter…Congo Bongo skips the literature and higher metaphor. One invents, one reworks. One is a clever parody. The other a respectable copy.

Or more accurately, Congo Bongo is the copy of a copy.

Not that it’s bad. Set in a faux-3D, isometric perspective, the game at least looks unique, with well-drawn sprites and environments that are clearly superior over its inspirations. And of the game’s four stages, only the first ostensibly rips from Nintendo’s manic classic; later levels, if anything, bear a closer resemblance to Konami’s Frogger, wherein crossing dangerous plains and waterways filled with dangerous critters supersedes the “get-to-the-top” pretensions of before.

And this is probably for the best, as the angled perspective makes gauging depth and distance a tricky enterprise when dodging falling coconuts amidst the first stage’s chasms and choppy outcroppings. This verticality is swapped for “flatter” proceedings in the later stages, better fitting the safari-man protagonist’s slow movements and singular ability—bounding over pits and baddies alike. The enemies, at least, grant the game a semblance of personality, boasting both wild designs and some unexpected behaviors. Stage one’s monkeys, for instance, will latch onto the hero and deaden his movements. But should all three of the pipsqueaks grab the player together, they’ll literally tow him to the edge of the cliff before throwing him to the depths below. It’s almost worth sacrificing a life to see it happen.

But if Donkey Kong was consequential, even revolutionary, Congo never escapes its facile pretensions. It’s a facsimile without a purpose, lacking even the narrative heft that made its forebear so memorable. In that game, Mario must retrieve his lady love; in this game, the nameless hero simply wants to pay back an ape’s mischievous prank.

Sega would later create some of the arcade’s greatest games and spectacle. Congo Bongo foreshadows none of that later genius, offering just a one-note, incidental experience.--D

Publisher: Sega/Gremlin

Developer: Sega

Release: 1983

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Congo Bongo Rampaging Rhinos
Congo Bongo Rampaging Rhinos
Congo Bongo Monkey Trio Heave-ho
Congo Bongo Monkey Trio Heave-ho

The mini-rhinos here also feature some dynamic behaviors, but the stage itself is a rather one-note affair.

It's not Donkey Kong. It's not Frogger. It's Congo Bongo!

The first stage is probably the most creative, featuring enemies of a number of behaviors and personalities.

Coryoon: Child of Dragon

Platform: PC-Engine

Coryoon - Title Screen Sunset
Coryoon - Title Screen Sunset
Coryoon - Underwater
Coryoon - Underwater
Coryoon - Title Screen Crystal Caves
Coryoon - Title Screen Crystal Caves

The “shooter,” as known in the 1980s, was defined by bullets and dodging impossible odds. Galaga, Gradius, Raiden…a lone, nameless pilot had to somehow penetrate droves of alien or terrestrial foes. But as the decade blended into the ‘90s—as gamers wished to better “know” their digital avatars—the so-called cute ‘em up rose into being. Suddenly, in place of the non-descript ship, witches and bunny girls and big-headed androids were careening across home and arcade screens.

And Coryoon very much adheres to this trend of the precious and eccentric, featuring a wee baby dragon firing past hoards of other adorable foes. After an evil magician-type turns the tyke’s beloved princess into a winsome little girl, the pipsqueak flies off to break the poor girl’s curse—which means fighting everything from penguins to spinning snowmen. It’s eight stages of kawaii mayhem; even the mid and end-level bosses bear a cute cheekiness, from flying unicorns to monstrous crabs before, at last, the dragon faces his ultimate nemesis—a gray doppelganger of himself. Is this a statement on how darkness infects even in the most innocent, cloying of hearts? No, actually, probably not.

The game is not unlike Air Zonk, the developer’s other big-headed, farcical blast ‘a’ thon that sends its protagonist through lands of color and outrageous forces. Similarly, Coryoon’s levels are simple in orientation but dazzle in eye candy, with lush backgrounds built on layers of mesmerizing parallax and stacked in enemies that, although ultimately fodder, pack more personality than the average leading hero. If not a revolutionary experience in terms of gameplay, the title is at least breathtaking to behold—assuming players can keep track of all the moving parts.

Indeed, the game is busy, with the player’s shots popping multitudes of enemies into point-granting fruit that then spill across that already-crammed canvas. It’s perhaps the game’s one true flaw; often, there’s just too much motion and commotion to track all the projectiles, powerups, fruit, and baddies crowding the screen. It’s either a beautiful collage or an overwrought mess, a sightly maelstrom matched by some moving tunes.

Despite the chaos, the game generally plays fair, offering three difficulty settings to help players of any skill (or patience level) proceed through the stages. The little dragon, so long as he has a powerup, can also take an additional hit before plunging off-screen—and since powerups are everywhere, good players will shift between taking damage and grabbing the next upgrade before ever meeting actual defeat. Those weapon options are fun, too, with flamethrower fire breath, a water-esque pressure beam, and an electric spread all offering a diverse range of attacks that can each be upgraded into immense swaths of consequence.

Trapped and buried on a doomed console, and beholden to what’s since become a niche genre, Coryoon’s present obscurity is hardly surprising. And granted, it’s not revolutionary or particularly remarkable…just likable. Sugary. A mouthful of cotton candy that quickly melts into memory. It’d be hard to recommend the game over the TG16’s other headlining shooty cuties—Magical Chase and Air Zonk, especially—but there’s no denying Coryoon’s incorrigible charm and earnest sensibilities. The developers imbued its hero with plenty of charm, and the Princess with a certain loveliness that resonates beyond time and genre.

Coryoon might not be the best shooter, but it’s one of the most endearing. And for a game essentially about blasting cute critters in oblivion, that is a remarkable achievement.--D

Publisher: NEC

Developer: Naxat Soft

Release: 1991

Genre: Shooter

Coryoon - Chameleon Frog
Coryoon - Chameleon Frog

Coryoon offers some nifty extra modes, including a finely illustrated sound test and a score attack mode, the latter practically a game unto itself.

Levels are varied in setting but otherwise lack differentiating features. In short, outside the changing enemy types, the stages play largely the same.

Coryoon sports plenty of subtle flourishes and details, including a dynamic title screen that shifts through the game's stages if left unattended.

Coryoon - Desert and Pyramid
Coryoon - Desert and Pyramid
Coryoon - Golden Gamera Boss
Coryoon - Golden Gamera Boss

Boss fights offer the game's greatest surprises of variety, offering mad unicorns, giant lobsters, golden golems...and these guys.

Coryoon - Sound Test
Coryoon - Sound Test
Coryoon - 2-Minute Score Attack
Coryoon - 2-Minute Score Attack
Coryoon - Score Attack Blasting
Coryoon - Score Attack Blasting

Although the graphics are nice, the narrative cutscenes are exquisite. What dragon wouldn't be obsessed with a princess like that?

Coryoon - Succulent Princess
Coryoon - Succulent Princess
Coryoon - Princess and her Dragon
Coryoon - Princess and her Dragon

Crush Roller

Platform: Neo Geo Pocket Color

The screen above will become increasingly common in the later stages.

The "Pac-Man Clone." It’s the informal term for any overhead maze game in which collecting and survival are the foremost priorities. In Pac-Man, this meant eating all the dots while avoiding the ghosts. In Ladybug, this meant eating all the flowers while avoiding the insects. In Mouse Trap, this meant collecting all the cheese while avoiding the cats.

But Crush Roller tries something different—rather than skittering a critter through a maze of crumbs and foodstuffs, the player here steers a nondescript paintbrush. There’s no food to collect, just corridors to paint. And once the maze is completely glazed, another set becomes available. Enemy “fish” provide the challenge, patrolling the arenas and often giving chase. Players can escape the stalkers by using “rollers” situated in specific lanes. Almost like a zipline, these squeegees race back and forth, flattening foes and buying precious time, but at a cost; the fish always respawn now faster than before.

Based on the 1981 arcade game (called Make Trax in North America), this port is easily the definitive edition. Vastly improved audio and aesthetics aside, the game offers a variety of new mazes that become selectable as progress is made, allowing players to essentially plot their own unique “route” to the conclusion. Moreover, a unique “saboteur” will appear in each level, leaving footprints across the freshly laid paint and undoing progress. Should these characters be intercepted, however, they become added as a memento to the visual “Ojama-Collection” archive, giving expert players a curious sub-objective to achieve.

All this whimsy, however, belies a cruel difficulty; in later levels, enemies become especially swift-finned, making escape nigh-impossible unless a roller is nearby. Also odd, rounding corners sometimes leaves single pixels behind unpainted...and virtually invisible. Having to pinpoint and then backtrack to these off-color artifacts can be nerve-wracking, especially on a small screen already crowded by ever-encroaching foes. Infinite continues help mollify the frustrations somewhat, but high-score chasers are in for a chore.

Still, this is an excellent update to the original game, with enough nuance and charm to elevate it well above being just another insipid clone. It’s not Pac-Man…but it still paints a pretty picture.

Publisher: SNK Corporation of America

Developer: ADK Corporation

Release: 1999

Genre: Arcade, Maze-Runner

Diet Go Go

Platform: Arcade

Diet Go Go - Cemetery
Diet Go Go - Cemetery
Diet Go Go - Devils
Diet Go Go - Devils
Diet Go Go - Plumped Up
Diet Go Go - Plumped Up

The two athletes - not pumped up, but plumped up. Ha!

As a follow-up to Tumble Pop, Diet Go Go would be almost akin to a bootleg reskin if not for one key difference—while the former was about exploiting gravity to one’s benefit, Diet Go Go outright defies it. This time, players must send their attackers airborne, bouncing them like beach balls between other foes. But rather than using a vacuum set in reverse, the male and female pair toss fruit (pink apples?) to fatten their baddies up. One piece suffices, bloating the minion enough to be knocked into other foes, while a second fruit “poufs” them into balloon-like wrecking balls that can be sent ricocheting around the screen, pulverizing anything in its trajectory. It’s fun if nonsensical. And requires little, if any, real skill or finesse.

And that, alongside its derivative nature, is Go Go’s greatest flaw. Levels almost seem to complete themselves, with a single ping-ponging attack often clearing a drove of enemies with little thought or action by the player. Powerups, from speed boosts to increased firepower, make progression even easier. The only real wrinkle is the addition of a slot machine—by collecting coins, three roulettes will spin at the top of the screen, sometimes rewarding players with a deluge of gems and other items. But effectively, it adds little to the overall experience.

More interesting, maybe, is the game’s obsession with food. Although the protagonists can hurl an unlimited, rapid-fire supply of fruit, enemies can fling their own foodstuffs. Touching a cupcake belched by, well, a walking cake, will bloat the player and decrease his speed, while a second hit brings complete obesity…and defeat. It’s a quirky, even counterintuitive dynamic, considering food almost universally signifies a point bonus in similar games. And instead of having to run that extra poundage off, which would have made too much sense, all it takes is grabbing another item—an energy drink—to trim that poundage off.

Like Tumble Pop, players complete stages by globetrotting the world. But unlike its predecessor, the locales here are much more surreal and bear little resemblance to their real-world counterparts. England, for instance, is set in a bizarre candy land, Russia holds a haunted grove, and the Bermuda Triangle features, what else, an underwater Atlantean city. Bosses are entertaining but equally bizarre, ranging from a gigantic vampire to a crab-like, walking pot of boiling carrot stew. Dr. DePlayne, the villain and only true holdover from Pop, delivers the final confrontation.

Where Go Go excels, at least marginally, is in its art design. Enemies are more expressive, backgrounds more detailed, and the main characters (slightly) more memorable than in Tumble’s efforts. The music, unfortunately, merely serves its purpose, lacking the catchy quality of its forebear’s; while Tumble Pop manages to remix its main theme again and again without anyone minding or even noticing, Go Go’s attempt to do the same is more glaring in light of already feeling a bit recycled. And yet, despite its insipidness, the game is still fun. Fast-paced and polished. And extremely accessible to the casual passerby.

But without some greater substance—some added technique or flourishes to learn—the game becomes the junk food it’s supposed to hate. A middling recipe destined for the kitchen drawer. An ephemeral distraction at best, a disposable diversion at worst.

Diet Go Go never received a home release, and the “why” is obvious. The game is just a snack; a 25-cent palate cleanser between bigger, zestier dishes.--D

Publisher: Data East

Developer: Data East

Release: 1992

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Diet Go Go - Evil Queen
Diet Go Go - Evil Queen
Diet Go Go - Stew Pot Boss
Diet Go Go - Stew Pot Boss
Diet Go Go - Interstitial
Diet Go Go - Interstitial
Diet Go Go - Cutscene
Diet Go Go - Cutscene

Bosses are pretty wacky, with the top parodying the Evil Queen from Disney's Snow White.

Wordless "cutscenes" are interspersed between the completed worlds. Funny!

Don Doko Don

Platform: Arcade

Don Doko Don Title Screen
Don Doko Don Title Screen
Don Doko Don Mallet the Mushroom
Don Doko Don Mallet the Mushroom
Don Doko Don - Bob and Jim
Don Doko Don - Bob and Jim

Meet Bob and Jim, the game's two unlikely heroes.

Taito released a flurry of platformers in the late ‘80s, many of which were of the single-screen variety. Bubble Bobble, of course, is the most renowned, and led to a series of popular sequels and spinoffs. But a separate franchise started around the same time, starring not bubble-blowing dinos, but a spunky witch who transformed her enemies into mushy cakes. It never received a true sequel, but did inspire a similar title set (vaguely) in the same universe. Known by its Japanese-transliterated name as Don Doko Don, the witch has been transplanted by two dwarven, mallet-wielding lumberjacks tasked with rescuing the land’s precious princess.

As unlikely as they seem, these garden gnome doughboys are actually a natural fit for a world of runaway mushrooms, lollipop-lapping crocs, penguins donning cat pajamas, and giant worms anxious to swallow the gnomes whole. Players must guide their wizened warriors through fifty-stages of such wackiness, stunning enemies with their mallets and then flinging them at other foes. Multiple baddies can be carried for a stronger attack, but like a hot potato, these fiends can't be held for long—tossing them fast is critical to survival.

But no matter. The stages themselves are the bigger threat, featuring platforms and ledges of often lethal character. Some are bouncier than an air mattress, constantly bobbing the player in errant directions. Others are slippery, or act like conveyors, or literally spin around, knocking minions in wayward motions; no matter the type, they’re always arranged around dangerous, ever-encroaching foes. Couple these quirks with level designs that don’t always offer an obvious or intuitive solution, and the game can get surprisingly difficult.

The dwarves aren’t particularly formidable, either. They move as one would expect from a rotund old-timer—sloooow, in other words, and their mallets are barely better, offering both limited range and power. As in other Taito platformers, powerups are always spawning, including crucial strength potions that allow enemies to be hurled through walls (to hit other oblivious foes), and speed boosts to help prod the stodgy gnomes along. These enhancements last until defeat, but other consumables, from time-stopping statues to throwable hammers, are strictly temporary. Some items are so uncommon that, in typical Taito tradition, their true purpose is often lost on the casual player. Indeed, an additional fifty levels (and a secret ending) hides within Doko's depths…but most will never know.

A highlight, perhaps, are the game’s bosses that dominate every tenth stage. Although designed to steal lives (and quarters), they’re at least memorable, featuring a variety of outlandish designs. Similarly, the enemies are colorful and brim with personality, granting a comical touch to the proceedings. In fact, it’s only the heroes who disappoint, the pair feeling bland, even generic, by comparison. Backgrounds, although generally flat and low-detail, at least change by stage, veering radically from each other depending on the setting. Some jaunty tunes further establish the quirky mood.

Which means Don Doko Don is a good game, and one that probably deserves more prominence in the grand canon of single-screen releases. It isn’t as instantly fun as Snow Bros., lacks the lullabic warmth of Rod-Land, and can't match the infectious catchiness of Bubble Bobble’s main theme in terms of sound. But as a successor to The Fairyland Story, this is an admirable step forward.

If only Taito had given the series another chance.--D

Publisher: Taito

Developer: Taito

Release: 1989

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Don Doko Don Raibow World
Don Doko Don Raibow World
Don Doko Don Spinning Platforms
Don Doko Don Spinning Platforms
Don Doko Don - Magician Boss
Don Doko Don - Magician Boss
Don Doko Don - The Fairyland Story Worm
Don Doko Don - The Fairyland Story Worm

Later levels take an especially surreal edge, with twirling platforms and psychedelic backgrounds.

Bosses can also be...a bit flamboyant.

Fans of The Fairyland Story may remember this ravenous worm. Come on, now, where're Ptolemy and her tasty cakes?

Donkey Kong Jr.

Platform: Arcade

Donkey Kong Junior Stage 3
Donkey Kong Junior Stage 3
Donkey Kong Junior Ouch!
Donkey Kong Junior Ouch!

The game is tough. The surreal Stage 4 is especially so.

Donkey Kong Junior Stage 4
Donkey Kong Junior Stage 4

The original Donkey Kong is a legitimate classic—if Pac-Man gave the medium a persona, DK gave it a sense of consequence, an added incentive to prevail. With these two titles, gaming overcame its racing and space-blasting constraints to become a journey not just of action, but of synergy shared between player and avatar. Unlike its contemporaries, DK offered a conclusion—a possible happy ending—if the player was willing to get serious. Movies and books offer effort-free finales, but in gaming, Kong signified a new paradigm: nothing is guaranteed. Happy endings needed to be earned.

Or put another way, Donkey Kong elevated the characters and quest above the gimmicks. Both hero and villain had their separate roles and goals to play. And anyone who participated in their unfolding drama—the player—became part of the story by joining, or even becoming, the protagonist himself. For some, it was an out-of-body experience.

Then Donkey Kong Jr. came around, demoting the original’s hero to villain status and inviting players to now command Junior, the big ape’s pudgy son. Like Mario in the previous outing, the wee primate must traverse four stages of assorted hazards, this time climbing vines and dodging chomping traps and hurdling pesky birds to free his dad from captivity. It’s another “reach the top” affair, but the graphics are more expressive and Junior’s moveset a bit more elaborate than what the first game dared to achieve. Superficially, it’s the superior experience. But somehow, it fails to captivate—to fully absorb—as its predecessor did just a year before.

Why? Some might say it’s due to Junior’s stodgy controls, whether jumping from platforms or hoisting himself from vine to vine. Others might blame the unrelenting enemies that are difficult to evade or even predict.

But perhaps the true reason owes to a deeper, more primal source. If the original Donkey Kong encapsulates, however imperfectly, the Hero’s Journey, it’s therefore a link to the collective unconsciousness of Man—his need to protect, to rescue, to be heroic. This makes Mario the player’s insertion point, the individual each must become to rescue his princess of myth. But in Junior’s case, such a spiritual leap isn’t so easy. Who dreams of freeing a goofy gorilla, especially one hated and defeated in the previous adventure?

That’d be like the knight, after saving his damsel, rushing back to now help the dragon. It’s a little weird and inexplicable. And likely explains why Junior’s game, even today, is nowhere near as adored as its forefather. And indicates why Junior himself has all but been stricken from the Nintendo canon.

People long to be heroic—to be dashing men, in a sense.

But who dreams of being the beast?—D

Publisher: Nintendo

Developer: Nintendo R&D1, Iwasaki Electronics

Release: 1982

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Donkey Kong Junior Opening
Donkey Kong Junior Opening
Donkey Kong Junior Title Screen
Donkey Kong Junior Title Screen
Donkey Kong Junior Mario's Hideout
Donkey Kong Junior Mario's Hideout

Mario is the villain? And is the second "Mario" a prototypical Luigi?

Oh, Mario also has a secret hideout, apparently. And a helicopter. Good thing Junior has Pauline's parasol with which to give chase!

Although Junior is featured prominently, Nintendo has abandoned the poor tyke in recent years.

Drop Wizard

Platform: iOS (reviewed), Android

Cute cutscenes open each area, adding a light sense of context to the proceedings.

The advent of the cell phone/smartphone was, for a time, a second renaissance for games of an arcade-style or vintage. People on the go didn’t necessarily need a 100-hour big budget experience—often, a five-minute distraction would do. Although often hampered by the medium’s clumsy keypad or touch-button controls, these underappreciated genres and franchises at least enjoyed a brief breath of new life.

But, yes, cell phone gaming didn’t always serve the classic formula well, especially where arcade ports were concerned. While classics like Rod-Land were unceremoniously forced into using awkward digital d-pads and buttons, new games designed specifically for the mobile market often forged better solutions. And Drop Wizard does just that, devising its “beat-the-screen” mechanics around a very simple scheme—tapping the left or right side of the playfield moves the character in the same, corresponding direction.

And that character is Teo, a squat little hero in the single-screen platform tradition. By moving him left and right, the wizard can drop between platforms, automatically firing his wand as he lands. This burst of magic will stun most foes caught within the crossfire, allowing it to then be rolled and dropped onto other ledges and targets. If timed right, a bumped baddie can steamroll through a whole legion of enemies, absorbing them into one sticky, screen-clearing, growing snowball of an attack.

If this sounds reminiscent of Snow Bros.’s (or, more accurately, Tumble Pop’s) main method of attack, at least the game sports an interesting wrinkle; in what amounts to being a single-screen autorunner, Teo can’t stop moving. At least, not precisely. Quick-fingered players can pivot him awkwardly in place, but otherwise, Teo will bound forward like a runaway dog, forcing players to plan accordingly.

The game is divided over ten worlds of six stages each, the final of which houses a boss of varying trouble. Fruits, gems, and coins regularly appear for score bonuses, and items occasionally sprout to ignite a screen-clearing attack or health refill (six hits, not one, ends the wizard here). The enemies themselves, however, are perhaps the game’s most interesting element—tiny wart hogs bound between platforms, sentient sandcastles creep beneath toy buckets (thus requiring an extra hit to defeat), ghosts fade in and out, escaping attacks, and mole-like things burrow within the platforms, popping out at inopportune times. Each world also has a set of three stars to collect—the game’s true final boss and ending requires that all thirty be retrieved.

It’s also an attractive adventure, offering cute, old-school graphics accompanied by some surprisingly robust tunes. Capturing the charm of the genre’s vintage best was obviously important to the developer; it’s magically derivative, to coin a phrase, but the team repurposes that well-worn template into something that well-suits the medium’s limitations. Which is to say, Drop Wizard deserves a place in that elite pantheon of single-screen Kings, even if its mobile compromises still render the overall experience a little too simplistic, a little too restrictive, to truly match the likes of Rod-Land or Bubble Bobble.

But for single-screen platforming on the go, the genre doesn’t get much better than this.--D

Publisher: Neutronized

Developer: Neutronized

Release: January 8th, 2015

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Drop Wizard - Boss Rush Mode
Drop Wizard - Boss Rush Mode
Drop Wizard - Mia
Drop Wizard - Mia

Bosses can be big, but are usually easy to take down.

An unlockable boss rush is available, starring Teo's companion, Mia.

Ignore the broken status bar at the top. At review, the game proved slightly incompatible with newer versions of iOS.

Flicky

Platform: Arcade

Flicky Title Screen
Flicky Title Screen

Levels become increasingly complex with long falls and dead ends.

The single-screen platformer certainly had its champions, with Taito and Data East becoming the genre’s most prolific supporters. But early on—a year before Taito’s seminal The Fairyland Story would forever reshape the SSP’s destiny—Sega tried an experiment of its own. That game was Flicky.

The goal was simple—hop the eponymous Flicky around a scrolling, wrapping screen, collecting baby chicks while evading a slew of chasing cats and lizards. Compared to Sega’s later fare—Space Harrier, Out Run, and After Burner—the game seemed quaint and insignificant. Indeed, few gamers remember Flicky as a classic or even an overlooked sleeper. But beneath its simplistic pretensions is a game just as fun as its competition.

Donkey Kong is about reaching the top; Mario Bros. focuses on clearing the screen of marauding creeps. Both represent the leading conventions for their time. And Flicky? It discards both premises for a more dynamic third: by tossing phones, fruit, and other household items, the player can either attack the cats or choose to elude them. This means being constantly on the run while canvassing the screen, snatching birds across ledges both high and low, then dashing for the just unlocked exit. Defeated kitties always return, however, forcing players to decide between fighting an ultimately losing battle, or staying defensive and flying for the door as quickly as possible. Compared to Nintendo’s early platformers, Flicky offers a more fluid, less-constrained experience, emphasizing both vertical and horizontal movement in a dynamic combination of speed and freedom.

The “liberated” feeling is due, in part, to the game’s scrolling, looping arenas. Arguably, this disqualifies the game from being a true SSP, but the “scroll” is more for effect than breadth, projecting a frantic cat-and-mouse chase that a static space wouldn’t quite convey. It’s essentially the classic cartoon trope of a toon running down an abnormally long hallway of repeating backdrops made into a playable game. If the arena were to be frozen in place without the scroll, everything would still fit perfectly within the screen.

Despite Flicky’s clever remixing of the genre’s early staples, it never gained much appreciation—at least not in the West. Whether due to the overly cutesy characters or sometimes erratic, ping-pongy controls, the game’s imprint on the medium was ephemeral at best. But with 48 unique stages to see, bonus rounds, and some catchy music, Flicky isn’t flashy, but it is fun. And for a single-screen platformer, that’s really the point.—D

Publisher: Bally Midway

Developer: Sega

Release: 1984

Genre: Single-screen Platformer (sort of)

The final stages get...surreal, abandoning brick and plaster for the endless expanse of space.

Flicky's physics are a bit unwieldy when jumping (bouncing) between walls, making setups like this extra tricky.

Bonus rounds are interjected every few rounds for a brief breather; now Flicky must scramble to catch her falling birds.

Did you know...

  • Flicky was inspired by Mappy

  • Flicky, the main character, is actually a species of bird in the Sonic the Hedgehog games

  • Flicky is actually a chick, er, a girl bird helping her fellow chicks (known here as "chirps")

Funky Jet

Platform: Arcade

Funky Jet First Stage
Funky Jet First Stage
Funky Jet Dual Bosses
Funky Jet Dual Bosses

The six "stages" all bear the same backdrop, using separate colored filters to evoke some semblance of identity. It all feels rather bootleg.

Funky Jet Stage Select
Funky Jet Stage Select

The single-screen platformer, from the mid-80s onward, tends to follow a straightforward formula. Character hops about a map; character defeats enemies by virtue of a (normally) clever, chain-ready mechanic; stage is beaten once the final baddie is ousted. Funky Jet subverts the first of these principles.

How? With a jet pack! Moving the joystick upward tosses the protagonist airborne where he can freely navigate the arena. It’s fun, but removes the “platforming” from the platformer, giving the hero an unusual advantage over his more grounded foes. While the game’s majority of punks and scoundrels are still bound to gravity and the ledges they pervade, the player can zip between them easily, pounding bloke after bloke with no fear of mistiming a jump. In essence, it renders the game’s level designs almost moot—if the player can move around freely without penalty, the placement or even presence of platforms are more incidental that consequential.

Fortunately, the gift of flight isn’t the only trick in Funky Jet’s arsenal. Perhaps sensing the drawbacks of offering players full, unfettered control, the game experiments (and compensates) by mixing the gameplay with the qualities of a brawler. Armed with boxing gloves, the nameless hero does just that—he must punch his villains into submission. Stringing enough successful punches together sends the enemy flying across the screen, hopefully to knock out other foes in a point-inducing combo. It’s a clever melding of genres.

But experimental mechanics aren’t always enough to redeem a half-baked experience. And here, the game is short, repetitive, and suffers from the aforementioned vacuous level design. The seven stages, comprised of multiple scenes each, are cookie-cutter to their core, merely repeating what was done before (same enemies, even same backdrop, in many cases). Indeed, the final stages are so clearly dry on ideas, all they can do is bludgeon the screen with gobs of goons, swapping calculated level design with outright chaos. Promising mechanics don’t always lend to creative execution, it seems.

Funky Jet is an obscure release that feels borderline bootleg in its presentation. But, in a genre that loves repeating ideas, the developers here deserve credit for at least tinkering with convention. The end result is thin, underwhelming, even unfinished. But as a proof-of-concept, there’s real potential here.--D

Publisher: Mitchell Corporation

Developer: Mitchell Corporation

Release: 1992

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Funk Jet Too Many Enemies
Funk Jet Too Many Enemies
Funky Jet Literal Mini Boss
Funky Jet Literal Mini Boss
Funky Jet Final Boss
Funky Jet Final Boss

The denouement with the final boss is a multi-scene affair that actually feels inspired. Other SSPs have done worse.

The game begins running out of ideas by the final stages, using heaps of enemies to hide the otherwise absent level design.

This recurring "mini" boss appears in every stage, serving as a sort of comic foil destined to fail again and again.

Galaga: Destination Earth

Platform: Game Boy Color

The backgrounds suffice...if nothing else.

Hasbro wasn’t always just a toy company; in the mid-90s, it founded Hasbro Interactive, a video game production house dedicated, in part, to reviving old-school classics from gaming’s past. Yes, even back in the year 2000, games like Frogger and Pac-Man were already considered retro.

Unfortunately, Hasbro Interactive’s take on these faded franchises didn’t always achieve the same classic status. A prime example is the company’s 8-bit take on Galaga, a sloppy “reimagining” that zaps all the fun and charm from the original. Enemies swarm and swerve in indecipherable patterns, pelting the poor player’s ship with bullets difficult to dodge and, nay, even see! Indeed, the screen now scrolls left and right, allowing the aliens to drop their payload outside the screen at inexplicable, death-ensuring trajectories. The audio is also lacking, deprived of the original’s whimsical pops and pipings, although graphically, some of the backgrounds do sport a sort of pixelly, 8-bit charm.

So…don’t bother. Stick with the original or its legions of follow-ups and better remakes. Galaga ’88, Galaga Arrangement, and Galaga Wars for starters…--D

Publisher: Majesco Entertainment

Developer: Pipe Dream Interactive

Release: Sept. 25, 2000

Genre: Arcade Shooter

Gradius

Platform: Arcade, PC Engine (reviewed)

Gradius PC Engine - Title Screen
Gradius PC Engine - Title Screen
Gradius PC Engine - Laser Fighter
Gradius PC Engine - Laser Fighter

Levels often contain special challenges that interrupt the normal action like a mini-boss might. Top: The ship (Vic Viper) must dodge the junk spewing from the volcanoes below. Bottom: A cramped cage of lasers traps the player.

Gradius PC Engine - Volcanoes
Gradius PC Engine - Volcanoes

The “space shooter” began as a genre of firsts, a journey into the unseen far from beyond Pong and other terrestrial endeavors. Space Invaders ignited the phenomenon, offering a spate of aliens descending onto a lowly, dissenting ship—the first real taste of simulated survival and suspense. Galaga heightened that excitement, ushering in weaving, kamikaze-happy fiends that sprayed the stage with bullets and debris. Scramble went even farther, offering scrolling levels of unfolding dangers that kept players guessing right up until oblivion. The shooter, in these early days, was a malleable template, a genre seemingly built for endless interpretation and revision.

And then entered Gradius.

Konami’s 1985 classic redefined the genre yet again, stringing players through seven (and later, eight) stages of intergalactic harassment. Spitting Moai heads and exploding volcanoes and shattering dinosaur bones were but a few of the dangers players had to endure. In Gradius, each stage was a surprise, no stage was alike. Each was a well into a deeper hell, a beautiful voyage across a chasm of madness. Players proceeded not necessarily to win, but to simply witness what was waiting next off-screen.

Yes, Gradius redefined the shooter so well, the entire genre fell under its spell, that spinning continuum of experimentation soon reduced to a single dynamic. The shooter, and especially the side-scrolling kind, had simultaneously achieved its evolutionary peak and evolutionary dead end. Gradius was a new beginning for the genre, and more cruelly, the beginning of its crystallization and collapse.

Countless shooters followed the game’s seminal example. R-Type. Darius. Gleylancer. Thunder Force. Lords of Thunder. Each experience was similar. And each was different…but not different enough to redeem a genre doomed by its very liberation. Those scrolling stages of possibility, the swarming enemies and harrowing bosses, all became cliché. Like a crippled ship orbiting a dead star, the genre had become trapped by its own gravity. It’d run out of fuel.

Such is Gradius’ ironic legacy—a great game that, perhaps, proved too influential for its own good. Better shooters exist, of course, including some of the title’s own sequels, but in the end, their emergence only led to inevitable stagnation. By the late 1990s, the traditional shooter had lost both its resonance and its relevance against the first-person shooter. The action-RPG. The free-roaming adventure. Being just “fun” was no longer enough.

Yet, that evolutionary bottleneck did bear fruit in a certain sense—most ‘90s shooters, if not brilliant, were at least executed with a tried-and-true polish, their foundational template refined to nigh-perfection. Like pinball, the shooter was no longer about providing a new experience, but rather, a reliable burst of high-adrenaline entertainment. It was and still is a category of glory…however fleeting the feeling.

Congrats to Gradius, then, for getting the formula right back in ’85. It set the paradigm and froze the template, forever holding it in place.--D

Publisher: Konami

Developer: Konami

Release: 1985, 1991

Genre: Shooter

Gradius PC Engine - Trapped and Cramped
Gradius PC Engine - Trapped and Cramped
Gradius PC Engine - Moaning Moai
Gradius PC Engine - Moaning Moai
Gradius PC Engine - Stage 2
Gradius PC Engine - Stage 2
Gradius PC Engine - Exclusive Zone of Bones
Gradius PC Engine - Exclusive Zone of Bones

The arcade game has seven stages, but the PC Engine version got this additional eighth, a level that sends the ship into an exploding cavalcade of bones.

Gradius helped propel the shooter beyond its mostly single-screen dimensions much like Super Mario Bros. helped evolve the platformer beyond games like the non-scrolling Donkey Kong.

Gradius PC Engine - Brain Dead
Gradius PC Engine - Brain Dead

The final boss carries a clever twist--with all its minions blasted and surpassed, it's now utterly helpless.

Among other things, Gradius became famous for its clever upgrade system. By collecting special icons, players can configure their ship as needed. And in this stage, lasers are best for cutting through those pinkish walls.

Joe and Mac Returns

Platform: Arcade

Joe and Mac saving cavegirl
Joe and Mac saving cavegirl
Joe and Mac Returns Saving Girl
Joe and Mac Returns Saving Girl

Meet Joe! He club bad men. Then he bag bad men. Then he roll bad men into more bad men. Bad men flat!

Joe and Mac Returns Doing Some Clubbin'
Joe and Mac Returns Doing Some Clubbin'

Although the debate rages over which game in the Joe and Mac (Caveman Ninjas) series constitutes as the best entry, many overlook a leading contender—the rather obscure (and grammatically incorrect) Joe and Mac Returns. After starring in a sequence of more traditional platformers in which the bumbling duo clobber neanderthals and fight off dinos, the two conclude their adventures with a surprisingly low-key single-screen platformer.

And not surprising, the game plays similarly to other Data East SSPs, with players hopping across platforms, gathering stunned enemies, and rolling them back at other foes. This is done via a club and a primitive knapsack—bashing foes leaves them ready to be bagged and carried to other regions of the screen where they can then be flung/rolled at other enemies. The more baddies snagged, the better the resulting attack, but if held too long they’ll break free and take a life in the process. The usual powerups apply, from speed to range boosts, along with the occasional change in weapons. The stone wheel, for instance, is great for running down foes throughout the screen, but its ephemeral nature renders it largely irrelevant to the overall experience.

What the game lacks in originality, it at least compensates with polished gameplay and some seriously low-brow humor. Beating a location (divided into four or more stages) cues a silly cutscene in which Joe and Mac scheme to ogle a cute cavegirl with often mixed results. If not particularly progressive, at least the game is distinctive. Similarly, these cavegirls can be reached and rescued in the stages themselves; but should the player accidentally knock one on the noggin, poor Joe or Mac are in for a good slap, losing the fruit bonuses they would have normally claimed.

Of the “Data East SSP Trilogy”—Tumblepop, Diet Go Go, and Joe and Mac Returns—this is the superior entry, offering a challenge and memorable wackiness the others sadly lack. It looks good, the music is catchy with its mix of caveman grunts and animal sounds, and the huge boss fights keep the game feeling at least somewhat aligned with the pair’s earlier adventures. Indeed, it’s difficult to know which franchise this serves as the true sequel for, as it sports the same (apparently time-traveling) mad-scientist boss of the Tumble and Diet universe despite remaining decidedly prehistoric. Is this a follow-up or a crossover? Is this even canon at all?

Nevertheless, at least Data East finally got the SSP formula right, offering a game that, although boilerplate, transcends the weaknesses of its kin to merit some positive distinction. It’s good. Standing, maybe, even among the genre’s best.

This should have been the Joe and Mac game that came to ‘90s home consoles. Alas, it remained in the arcade…and what is often the case with these mid-90s games, went uncelebrated even there.--D

Publisher: Data East

Developer: Data East

Release: 1994

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Joe and Mac Returns Bowling for Neanderthals
Joe and Mac Returns Bowling for Neanderthals
Joe and Mac Mammoth Shower
Joe and Mac Mammoth Shower
Joe and Mac Cute Cavegirl Showering
Joe and Mac Cute Cavegirl Showering
Joe and Mac Returns Shower Girl's Hiny
Joe and Mac Returns Shower Girl's Hiny
Joe and Mac Returns Underwater Fight
Joe and Mac Returns Underwater Fight

Bosses tend to be large and colorful, connoting the earlier (scrolling) games of the Joe and Mac series.

Completing a location rewards with a quirky cutscene. They all share a similar, squealing theme...

Joe and Mac Returns Map Screen
Joe and Mac Returns Map Screen

Wouldn't be a Data East SSP without that illustrious map screen!

Keio Flying Squadron

Platform: Sega CD

Keio Flying Squadron - Clashing Dragons, Doomed Raccoons
Keio Flying Squadron - Clashing Dragons, Doomed Raccoons
Keio Flying Squadron - Rami in the Sky
Keio Flying Squadron - Rami in the Sky

Sharp cinematic stills reward the player in-between the various stages. They definitely help bring Rami to life.

Keio Flying Squadron - Rami and Grandmother
Keio Flying Squadron - Rami and Grandmother

The shooter. The shoot ‘em up. The shmup. Whatever one chooses to call the genre, most agree that the category both benefits and suffers from a single condition.

Predictability.

Whether horizontally or vertically oriented, the typical “shooter” presumes a number of tropes and baked-in mechanics: A ship or aircraft weaving through droves of dangerous foes. Huge, devastating bosses. Hundreds of enemy shots. And a host of psychedelic powerups to even the odds.

At its core, the shooter celebrates stress, survival, and destruction—elements that faithfully engage the psyche no matter how many times they’re repeated. It’s a genre drenched in adrenaline, a rotating gamut for anyone seeking to test his meddle. But such narrow aspirations beget a quick dead-end on the evolutionary tree. By the mid-1990s, the genre had reached its peak. Reliably exciting but also rote…the shooter found itself unable to transcend its primitive promise of fast, gratifying action. Whether blasting space bugs or scraping alien entrails, players always knew the basic script. Knew the routine. Sensed the ending. Shoot, move, shoot and move. Shoot to win. What had been a formative movement in the art form (starting with Space Invaders) had eventually become formula. The proceedings predictable, then trite, then simply trivial.

Hence the so-called cute ‘em up, an offshoot that exchanged the ships and heavy artillery of the typical shooter for the winsome and adorable. If the genre had become gripped by its own rigid definitions—by its wanton gauntlets of blaze and barrage—at least this aesthetic change allowed for more comedic sensibilities. A sweeter, sillier veneer. Sure, blasting was still the point, but when the bullets and spells are being dispelled by chibi penguins and doe-eyed witches, everything became a bit more personable. An exploding ship doesn’t draw tears. But a bunny girl getting torched by a tanuki? That might command a laugh.

Enter Keio’s Flying Squadron. It does nothing new and does nothing better than its contemporaries of the era. But it was cute. Wacky. Sassy. Irreverent. Part parody, part satire. And in the early-90s, beholding such nonsense in any genre, let alone the normally staid and unironic shooter, was shocking. Enough to transform an otherwise mundane game into something memorable.

Memorable, at least, had Keio not been released so late in North America, and on Sega’s underappreciated Sega CD platform. As the 16-bit age waned in the wake of the 32-bit revolution, most overlooked the strange game that saw Rami, a cute bunny girl, flying atop her pet dragon to stop a “raccoon” bent on world domination. It’s a nonsensical plot inspired loosely by a Japanese folk tale concerning a rabbit and a nefarious tanuki, and (very loosely) the story of Noah. Only, in this version, that rabbit is Rami…on the aforementioned dragon (named Spot)…facing off against gods and the American military and a hodgepodge of other tacked-on targets sent courtesy of that wacky raccoon (who has an IQ of 1400).

Mechanically, the game is nothing brilliant. Spot’s fire breath can be upgraded across two separate branches—a weaker three-way spread, or a more potent single shot that shoots straight ahead. Baby, “satellite” dragons can also be attained to bolster Rami’s overall firepower, while a secondary attack, from falling bombs to homing dragons, can also be attained. If not for their cutesy pretensions, it’d all be pretty boilerplate fare for the genre.

But cute is the point here, and whatever might be lacking in the mechanics and level design is redeemed through the sheer fervor of the game’s presentation. Tanuki rowing through the air in little boats. Flying pigs. Giant Kabuki and geisha bosses. A robotic, flame-belching cat. Mechanical turtles and rooster-roosting weather vanes. The levels are also stylized; stage two, for example, is literally presented as a stage, with the water resembling the wavy, wooden constructs seen in classical onstage performances and other art. In some sense, Keio was Yoshi’s Story and Paper Mario long before they were fashionable.

And that humor. Although Keio is wackier and weirder than outright funny, it still bears a charm—certainly a personality—that stands as a refreshing contrast to the self-serious games of today. The game’s animated cutscenes would have been especially endearing for a time when CD-multimedia was just beginning to emerge. But even now, it resonates in a way modern games can’t, or won’t, capture or invoke.

Keio comes from a time when average gameplay could be buoyed—even redeemed—my its presentation and theme. No one plays Parodius or The Game Paradise because of its clever proceedings—they do it for the humor, the cute girls, the zany what-will-happen-next expectations. Keio owes to the same tradition, entertaining as much through the sheer fervor of its nonsensical world, likable characters, and triumphant soundtrack as its flying and blasting mechanics. It was a time when gamers were more forgiving, and maybe less privileged, fostering a hobby in which a game like Keio could exist.

Like the overarching genre from which it spawned, the cute ‘em up has grown too niche for the mainstream… become too simple, too staid, and in Keio’s case, too politically incorrect for the bigger publishers. In an age where art has become controlled by a pronounced Marxist-esque puritanism, the role of the bunny-girl heroine—or any character of an alluring nature—has been diminished to the brink of extinction. And for that, Keio’s Rami is a decidedly progressive figure despite being a lass tucked in a bunny suit. She’s more at odds with the cultural censors of 2024 than back in the supposedly less-tolerant 1990s.

Like the aforementioned Parodius series, Rami would eventually fade away, with only two more games to her name—Keio Flying Squadron 2 (a platformer) and Rami-chan no Oedo Sugoroku: Keio Yugekitai Gaiden (a party game). The gal has been frozen in wistful limbo ever since, waiting and praying for a shooter-renaissance comeback…and for those social controllers to relinquish their grip and gain a sense of humor. Until that happens, Rami’s best days will remain in the ‘90s.

Niche games then, rare treasures now.--D

Publisher: JVC Musical Industries

Developer: Victor Entertainment

Release: 1993 (JP), '94 (EU), '95 (NA)

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Keio Flying Squadron - Cinematic Rami and Spot
Keio Flying Squadron - Cinematic Rami and Spot
Keio Flying Squadron - Serpent Reaching from the Deep
Keio Flying Squadron - Serpent Reaching from the Deep
Keio Flying Squadron - Kabuki Twins
Keio Flying Squadron - Kabuki Twins
Keio Flying Squadron - Cat, Hamster, and Whatevers
Keio Flying Squadron - Cat, Hamster, and Whatevers
Keio Flying Squadron - Tanuki Uproar
Keio Flying Squadron - Tanuki Uproar

Keio's charm lies in its many expressive enemies. More than just being targets, they have a certain character...a certain flavor.

Bosses are varied and can get quite outlandish. Note the hamster running inside that mechanical cat.

Keio Flying Squadron: Rami Blasting Across Wooden Waters
Keio Flying Squadron: Rami Blasting Across Wooden Waters

The game's art style sometimes resembles the wooden, painted stage of a kabuki theater. The game may be a tad staid in its gameplay, but aesthetically, it was ahead of its time.

Keio Flying Squadron: FMV Scene
Keio Flying Squadron: FMV Scene

Full-motion video scenes adorn the game's front and back ends. Although super grainy, they were certainly treats in '95--especially for anime lovers who were desperate for any of that rare "Japanimation" to come their way.

Keio Flying Squadron: Hitbox Options
Keio Flying Squadron: Hitbox Options

Keio's options are also impressive for their era. As shown in the screen's upper left corner, Spot's hitbox can be adjusted.

Magical Chase

Platform: PC Engine/TurboGrafx-16

Magical Chase Title Screen
Magical Chase Title Screen
Magical Chase Stage 4 Ducks ad Cuckoos
Magical Chase Stage 4 Ducks ad Cuckoos

For whatever reason, Ripple's original sprite, along with the aesthetics for stage 1, were reworked for the Western release (bottom). Which version is superior?

Magical Chase Stage 1 Japanese Edition
Magical Chase Stage 1 Japanese Edition

What do spaceships and witches have in common? They both lend themselves well to the shooter (or “shoot ‘em up”) genre in which a vessel flies against scrolling graphics, blasting all kinds of incoming baddies.

Not surprisingly, the planes and futuristic starships that “starred” in the earliest of these fodder-fests were not exactly personable; players might enjoy piloting a war machine or jet fighter, but they weren’t exactly empathizing with the hypothetical pilot inside. And so, as a possible response, the so-called "cute ‘em up" came into being, a sub-genre that still maintained the gun-heavy tropes of its more serious counterparts while adding humor and at least a hint of personality.

And Magical Chase is a good example. It replaces the ship with a pink n’ frilly witch, a cutie-pie named Ripple who must traverse six outrageous stages casting spells and zapping nasties. From a developer’s standpoint, a witch makes the perfect vessel—like a ship, she still flies and fires, still cavorts with all sorts of strange and unsavory threats. But she’s also endearing in a way a sprite of mechanical, metallic design could never be. If the intent was to create a shooter of humor and approachability, implementing a witch of Ripple’s whimsy was the natural, even obvious choice. This is a game that, with its similarly outlandish cast of baddies and bosses, stops just short of parody.

But despite its classic status—the U.S. release is one of gaming’s rarest treasures—the game has been a mite overhyped in recent years. Ripple, for all her mischievous potential, is a character better defined in the manual than anything onscreen. Per the booklet, she’s the one responsible for releasing her demonic nemeses into the world. And now, she's the one forced to reign them in. She's more an anti-hero, in short…but without the manual, it’s an important detail all-but impossible to discern. For most players, Ripple and her adversaries never fully transcend being cursor and target; for an experience spun around larger-than-life characters and winsome kitsch, the enemies still feel like mobile props, the witch still more a starcraft than a person of real witchcraft.

It's a missed opportunity that limits Magical Chase’s, and its heroine’s, overall appeal and greater legacy--especially when juxtaposed against Cotton, gaming’s other preeminent (and amusing) spellcaster. Ripple’s game focuses on spectacle, on impressing players with its hardware-pushing tricks and upbeat tunes. But despite that manic wonderment and accompanying fast-action, players will still leave the game much like one leaves behind a passenger met on an airplane.

She was nice…we talked almost the whole time…and yet, I still know nothing about her.

Ripple is the girl everyone notices, but nobody knows.—D

Publisher: Palsoft, Turbo Technologies Inc.

Developer: Quest

Release: 1991/1993

Genre: Horizontal Shooter

Magical Chase Stage 1 Western Version
Magical Chase Stage 1 Western Version
Magical Chase Stage 3 Peek-a-boo
Magical Chase Stage 3 Peek-a-boo
Magical Chase Stage 5 's Miyazaki Influence
Magical Chase Stage 5 's Miyazaki Influence
Magical Chase Game Boy Color Stage 1
Magical Chase Game Boy Color Stage 1
Magical Chase Spell Shop Stop
Magical Chase Spell Shop Stop

The occasional shop offers new spells and other buffs...so long as enough gems are grabbed.

Stage 3 (top) is probably the game's most clever, with a giant gunship that "chomps" like a giant mouth. Stage 5 (bottom) sports a vague Miyazaki (Ghibli) influence.

Magical Chase Game Boy Color Cute Girl's Shop
Magical Chase Game Boy Color Cute Girl's Shop

In 2000, a Game Boy Color version was also released. It's a surprisingly faithful port, sporting even many of the PC Engine version's special effects (the parallax scrolling in particular).

Magical Chase GBC Stage Four Wood Blocks
Magical Chase GBC Stage Four Wood Blocks

Mario Bros. Classic

Platform: Game Boy Advance

Mario Bros. Game Boy Advance Title Screen
Mario Bros. Game Boy Advance Title Screen
Mario Bros. GBA Lava Background
Mario Bros. GBA Lava Background

Mario Bros. GBA, like its source material, follows an endless series of "phases." No princess is waiting at the end of this one.

Mario Bros. Game Boy Advance Phase 1
Mario Bros. Game Boy Advance Phase 1

In 2001, Nintendo unleashed the Game Boy Advance, its hot new “32-bit” handheld. And naturally (sarcasm intended), the company chose to rerelease a bunch of old Mario games to show off the system’s amazing capabilities. The first of these games was a Super Mario Bros. 2/Mario Bros. bundle redubbed as Super Mario Advance. One game was good, the other felt like an afterthoughtthe latter being, unfortunately, the already underappreciated Mario Bros.

Brought to arcades in 1983, the original game was a single-screen platformer all about frenetic survival. Designed for both sole or cooperative play, players scurried their respective brother around a simple playfield, avoiding and bopping enemies as they popped continuously from a pair of overhead pipes. Defeating a creature required punching the floor beneath it, thus flipping it upside down. The player could then trample the critter right over, tumbling it from the arena. But the capsized pests don’t wait forever; take too long and they angrily reright themselves, only now faster and deadlier than before.

The original game reveled in its hectic freneticism, with enemies of different types and tempos quickly storming an already crowded stage. The bigger threat, however, was the brothers’ own unwieldy movements, which were considerably limited compared to their later “Super” adventures; here, their jumps were intractable, meaning that the brothers were helpless once airborne. A misplaced leap often meant a deadly landing; later stages (termed “phases”) can only be survived with precise planning and execution.

The GBA version mirrors these proceedings, but with one key difference; the controls are now much more fluid and forgiving, allowing players to adjust their little Mario’s rise and descent, otherwise correcting a misjudged jump. It’s a sensible improvement, but one that also makes the game incredibly easy—and repetitive—as players climb to the 50th phase and beyond. (The average player would rarely see past the 15th board on the arcade original.)

Other differences are minor. The “shellcreeper” turtles, perhaps to prevent confusion with the stompable Koopa Troopas of later games, have been replaced by spikey-shelled Spinies. A second “POW” block, good for paralyzing every foe at once, has been added to the top of the arena. Moreover, these blocks can now be lifted and thrown Super Mario 2-style (although the advantage of this is dubious). And in another odd nod to Mario 2, players can enact a super jump by momentarily holding down the d-pad. Again, the benefit of this extra maneuver is debatable; maybe the designers, conveniently using the Mario 2 engine, simply couldn’t be bothered to remove these incidental extras.

The screen also scrolls...due no doubt to the GBA’s narrow display. This can lead to certain undeserved deaths as icicles and other surprises arrive offscreen without proper warning, but considering the low difficulty, this might be an acceptable concession. Of course, the scrolling works against the genre’s definition of being a single-screen experience, but because the gameplay remains the same, it can keep the SSP distinction.

As a no-frills bonus to the main (Super Mario 2) game, this isn’t a terrible rendition of an underappreciated classic. But the game’s uninspired, insipid, and ultimately dispensable nature only hinders the original’s reputation. A 4-player battle mode redeems the vanilla experience somewhat, but it’s more akin to Super Mario Bros. 3’s competitive co-op mode and less about being a rejuvenation of the arcade game.

And that’s unfortunate. Just like Donkey Kong for the Game Boy both revamped and reinvented the original’s arcadey gameplay to captivating effect, this take on Mario Bros. could have done the same.

And no, Mario Clash doesn’t count.--D

Publisher: Nintendo

Developer: Nintendo

Release: 2001

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Mario Bros. GBA Bonus Level
Mario Bros. GBA Bonus Level
Mario Bros. Game Boy Advance Super Jump
Mario Bros. Game Boy Advance Super Jump
Mario Bros. GBA Plucking POW Block
Mario Bros. GBA Plucking POW Block

The iconic POW Block can now be grabbed and carried around, but doing so wastes it in one throw. Probably best to leave it be.

The bonus levels return in much easier form now that the controls have been revamped.

A super jump is now possible, but it bears little advantage over normal leaping.

Backgrounds do change this time, quickly dispensing with the sewers for a more dungeon-esque aesthetic. They're just a tease, however--no final boss or greater surprise awaits.

Mario Clash

Platform: Virtual Boy

In Mario Clash, frontal attacks are useless on most foes, good for turning them around and little more.

Mario Clash - Giving Boo a boo-boo
Mario Clash - Giving Boo a boo-boo

As seen in the bottom-left corner, defeating enemies requires a sly attack from the side, meaning players will always be seeking the opposite plane.

Mario Clash - Combo Achieved
Mario Clash - Combo Achieved

Although Mario himself is almost invisible in this shot, he's managed a 2X combo by ricocheting a shell between two enemies. Such maneuvers are tough to pull off but are immensely satisfying.

Mario Clash - No Shells!
Mario Clash - No Shells!

Uh oh! Mario's in a predicament here, having no shell and surrounded by baddies. Without a Koopa Troopa nearby, the plumber can do nothing but evade and pray...he's utterly defenseless.

An occasional bonus level punctuates the action in which Mario must leap for the coins passing overhead. If played without the depth of the actual VB headset, catching all twenty is especially tricky.

Nintendo’s ill-fated but perhaps (slightly) underrated Virtual Boy was not meant for long-winded experiences. Its garish red-on-black graphics were often an eye-straining eyesore that demanded regular breaks. Indeed, the system itself boasted an “automatic pause” feature for this very reason; after so many minutes, the console would suggest taking a rest, allowing the player to pull his head out from the visor and give thanks for a world of color.

Hence Mario Clash, a game made for such fleeting, arcade-style proceedings. There’ no epic quest here to save the Princess or liberate the Mushroom Kingdom. There’s barely a story at all. It’s just Mario climbing, floor by floor, a Babel-high tower that’s been invaded, apparently, by some air-pirate interlopers. Crabs, snakes, beetles, Pokeys, Para-Goombas…the foes are more pest than pirate, making Mario more exterminator than liberator. It’s an obvious nod, of course, to the original Mario Bros., a single-screen platformer in which the hero had a critter-ridden sewer to clear; by defeating every enemy, Mario would advance to the next stage in which another set of creatures had to be expunged.

Mario Clash is no different, forcing Mario to stun, then bump, every enemy he encounters from the current floor. The “how,” however, is where the mission gets tricky—his signature “stomp” move is next to useless in this reality. It’s only good for paralyzing turtles, whose shell he must then hurl at other pests. But just tossing the projectile directly at them is not what the game wants; most enemies must be nailed from the side. This means Mario must travel between the foreground and the background, hurling the shell just as the enemy passes on the opposite, parallel platform.

When emulated on a modern system, this hopskotching between catwalks is handicapped by an acute lack of depth perception. Background ledges often blend with those on the forefront, causing just enough momentary confusion to beg an untimely death. This is how the real Virtual Boy proves itself, the machine providing the necessary sense of depth and clarity to better survive Clash’s dangers. Ideally, skilled players should be able to dive down pipes and warp swiftly between opposite planes, felling enemies with shells and even coordinating combos attacks before making a confident escape. That sensory depth is not only useful, it sets the game's rhythm.

But no matter how it’s played, the action soon grows repetitive long before the final 99th floor is reached, a reality exacerbated by floaty controls and a Mario left helpless unless another shell can be procured. Worse, because everything is fixed to a subtle three-point perspective, targeting is never wholly intuitive. For instance, when Mario is standing at the mid-point of the screen, he’ll toss the shell in a “straight” line as expected. But once he shifts more to the left or right, that straight trajectory becomes increasingly “diagonal” in terms of human perception, forcing players to adapt accordingly as they aim from the back or front platforms. Given how chaotic later levels become, and scarce the shells sometimes are, this slight disorientation can easily lead to swift defeat. And without a save feature of any kind (unless through emulation!), death means a cruel reboot to level 40, the highest floor players can choose when trying again.

Most Mario games are remembered fondly; Mario Clash isn’t remembered at all, its legacy not bad…just nonexistent. The game’s few fans had once hoped, even expected, it would be revived on the 3DS, but that opportunity has long since faded. This leaves Clash in a sort of perpetual purgatory, ignored by its Nintendo jailers who, in truth, seem equally eager to pretend the Virtual Boy itself never existed. If the 3DS was the VB’s spiritual successor, Clash still awaits a similar rebirth.

At least, if it’s a comfort, the game isn’t abundantly good, a quirky artifact of a very specific, transitional period of gaming history. In other words, that early 32-bit era is rife with quality titles sadly unsung in the modern clime, Nintendo-made or otherwise. And Mario Clash is hardly the most deserving of a resurgence.

Maybe, just maybe, not every Mario game is meant for immortality.--D

Publisher: Nintendo

Developer: Nintendo

Release: October 1995

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Mr. Do!

Platform: Game Boy

Mr. Do Game Boy - Game Boys can be Bonus Items!
Mr. Do Game Boy - Game Boys can be Bonus Items!

Note the skilled, assorted "texturing" with the levels above. Without the crutch of color, the artist(s) had to be extra clever in differentiating the game's distinctive stages.

Mr. Do Game Boy - Clever "coloring"
Mr. Do Game Boy - Clever "coloring"

Although an essentially defunct franchise now, Mr. Do! enjoyed a respectable measure of success during the Golden Age of Arcades and the immediate years thereafter. This meant a bevy of ports sprinkled across a number of home systems, some better than others. And the Game Boy version, amazingly, is one of the superior efforts.

So the gameplay is essentially the same—the eponymous Mr. Do, a clown who apparently enjoys digging into the lairs of underground monsters, must either collect all the cherries buried within a stage or, if necessary, defeat all the bad guys. Alternatively, levels can be completed by collecting the rarely-seen diamond, or by spelling “EXTRA” through the metagame of targeting certain creatures. New players will just scramble for the cherries or pop the incoming monsters as circumstances dictate.

No matter the goal, survival isn't easy. Mr. Do attacks with a “power ball” that ricochets around a level, maybe hitting the intended enemy, maybe not. But even if it does, the clown must wait a few seconds before he can attack again, leaving him incredibly vulnerable. A second means of defense—digging beneath apples and dropping them onto foes—can be used for both survival and scoring big points, but the swift-swarming enemies can make setting up a proper trap difficult to achieve.

This Game Boy conversion keeps the original’s frenetic whimsy intact, with well-drawn graphics, invigorating tunes, and some reasonably fast, smooth-scrolling action. This “scrolling” aspect, however, is also the port’s primary (if inevitable) weakness, as the detailed graphics all but necessitate the zoomed-in view. This means only a portion of the playfield is visible at a given time, making the anticipation of enemies exceedingly difficult. (Incidentally, selecting “pause” does reveal the full map and enemy placement). Purists might also disagree with the updated art design that reimagines the monsters as blobby, hairball-like things, and a garish, redrawn clown that looks almost like a monster himself. And lastly, the game’s underlying grid-based structure offers less freedom of movement than, say, the SNES adaptation.

And yet, the serious effort that went into this edition is evident throughout, from the impressive animation to even the menu options; the game is not arcade perfect, but for anyone wanting a quick Mr. Do! fix circa 1991, this was (and is) a sweet cherry jubilee.--D

Publisher: Ocean of America, Inc.

Developer: Universal Co., LTD.

Release: November 1992

Genre: Arcade, Maze Action

Mr. Do!

Platform: Super NES

Original Mode

Mr. Do SNES - Battle Mode
Mr. Do SNES - Battle Mode

Battle Mode

The Golden Age of Gaming was a surreal, trippy time for the fledgling medium. From scampering mice and bouncing kangaroos to scattering, neon centipedes, early game design happily embraced the absurd—a style not unlike the earliest cartoons that also indulged in the wacky and weird. But one such arcade classic, Mr. Do!, remains overlooked in this vast milieu; the game still awaits a proper 21st century revival despite its many Pac-Man and Q*bert contemporaries already receiving their generous share. In fact, so overdue is Mr. Do! for a proper return, the last remake it did receive was this very SNES port from 1996!

So, Mr. Do! is about a clown—a clown who inexplicably loves burrowing through the ground and collecting cherries while being chased by gangs of so-called “creeps,” odd monsters who apparently really hate little men in face paint. (Or, perhaps, intruders digging tunnels through their homes?) But unlike similar games like Dig Dug, where the goal is to simply eradicate all the bad guys, the player here has four potential options: grab all the cherries, defeat all the creeps, spell “EXTRA” by defeating specific enemies, or, if super lucky, snag a rarely-seen diamond.

The game’s genius rests in the first two of these objectives. As in Pac-Man, players can scramble for the cherries, hoping to outrun the creeps before becoming overtaken. Doing this, however, often forces the player into taking the second option as more and more enemies emerge from the center of the screen. Indeed, defeating foes often becomes inevitable, even desirable, when just trying to survive and clear the stage as expediently as possible. Mr. Do isn’t much of a warrior, either, so the mere act of attacking presents a strange risk/reward dilemma. His primary defense is a “power ball” that bounces somewhat erratically through the tunnels, maybe hitting the intended target, maybe not. But until it does hit something (and even a few seconds thereafter), the clown can’t attack again. This relegates him to fleeing and, if his timing’s right, crushing his pursuers beneath buried apples. But there are only so many apples….and they can flatten Mr. Do, too…and the enemies can also use them. Thus, what seems a silly Dig Dug rip-off is revealed to be a much more tactical affair of knowing when to pivot between sensible aggression and wise retreat.

Adding to the frenzy is the main sub-objective—every stage has a bonus item that freezes the usual enemies while a hoard of new creatures, the “alphamonsters,” now descend from the top of the screen. One of these creatures is labelled with a specific letter which, if defeated, adds to the spelling of “EXTRA.” Nail all five, and a hard-won extra life is rewarded.

This version is a nice conversion, offering a relatively authentic arcade experience while also including an additional “Battle Mode” that features updated graphics, extra items, and simultaneous two-player action. It’s unfortunate these (mildly) improved visuals and features can’t be activated for the main game, but the mode’s inclusion is still appreciated. More irksome are the controls which cannot perfectly duplicate a joystick’s precision, leading to the occasional, undeserved death.

Mr. Do! remains an oddly forgotten classic that, until someone revives the franchise for modern times, remains best played in the arcade or, amazingly, on the also very-vintage Super Nintendo.

An enthusiastic, if bittersweet, recommendation.--D

Publisher: Black Pearl Software

Developer: C-Lab

Release: Dec. 15, 1996

Genre: Arcade, Maze Action

Mr. Do's Castle!

Platform: Arcade

Mr. Do's Castle - Hazardous Ladders
Mr. Do's Castle - Hazardous Ladders
Mr. Do's Castle - Cherries, keys, or baddies...
Mr. Do's Castle - Cherries, keys, or baddies...

Levels can be beaten through enemy elimination or smashing all the cherry blocks.

Mr. Do's Castle - Title Screen
Mr. Do's Castle - Title Screen

The Mr. Do! series, to its credit, was never content to repeat the same ideas. After featuring the titular clown tunneling underground, fetching cherries and ricocheting “power balls” at prowling monsters, the sequel switched tracks by whisking its hero to the walls of a hassling castle. The tunneling done, the job now involved climbing ladders and hammering baddies—the same fiends, in fact, from the first game, but imbued with more platformer-friendly behaviors.

But like Namco’s Mappy, this isn’t a true single-screen platformer, or SSP. Mr. Do can't jump; rather, he runs and falls and climbs his way through the castle's stages. Should this disqualify him from the SSP category? Maybe, maybe not…but it’s a point worth mentioning.

The better question, however, might be whether the game is good. The first Mr. Do! is a minor classic, boasting dynamic, maze-game proceedings not unlike the simpler Dig Dug. Mr. Do’s Castle is less derivative, providing mechanics and ideas uniquely its own (minor Lode Runner similarities aside).

The problem, perhaps ironically, is that one mechanic it skips. The clown won't jump, only scurry, as his foes unfold and enclose. This leaves his mallet, then, as the only possible defense—if a monster is standing atop a block, Mr. Do can give the fiend a whack, sending it falling defeated through the floor. Similarly, the hero can flatten baddies below with a well-dropped block on the noggin. But if there is no cube to smack or hole to escape through, Mr. Do is, well, Mr. Doomed.

Worse, the mechanics change at level three—at that point, baddies can no longer be defeated when crossing a block. Inexplicably, they can now only be crushed from above, making for an exponentially harder game.

At least the Mr. Do! charm is still there, with decent graphics, catchy music, and gameplay that is fun despite the later difficulty spike. Had the clown been given an additional technique to evade or stun enemies—like a JUMP—the game would have gained greater success. Been more accessible. More intuitive.

Of course, the Mr. Do! series isn’t limited to this off-kilter sequel. For those hunting for a sequel closer to the original’s style, Do! Run Run is an excellent, more faithful follow-up.—D

Publisher: Universal

Developer: Universal

Release: 1983

Genre: Arcade, Platformer

Mr. Do's Castle: Is "Extra" Worth the Extra Effort?
Mr. Do's Castle: Is "Extra" Worth the Extra Effort?

Smashing three "key blocks" opens the door above, converting the enemies into wandering letters. Smashing these--and thus spelling "EXTRA"--will earn an extra life.

Nightmare in the Dark

Platform: Neo Geo MVS (Arcade)

Nightmare in the Dark - Roll Those Fireballs!
Nightmare in the Dark - Roll Those Fireballs!

Pack foes into fireballs and, um, roll them down slopes. Makes perfect sense!

Since 1986, the single-screen platformer has heavily borrowed from the Bubble Bobble template. Rather than just trying to reach the top, players were now supposed to run their avatar all over the board, collecting items and powerups while trouncing all the baddies. Once the last one was vanquished, a new stage dropped with similar but remixed proceedings.

But more than Bubble Bobble, it was 1990’s Snow Bros. that really seemed to inspire the genre. The elegant mechanic of bowling enemies down slopes into other foes was too obvious, too intuitively satisfying, for other single-screen adventures to ignore. Hence Nightmare in the Dark, a game that, despite appearing a decade later, still shamelessly sticks to the classic’s gameplay.

This time, the player commands a gravekeeper who slings reams of fire at his undead foes. But rather than incineration, the foes merely become paralyzed, allowing the player to continue “stacking” more attacks until the enemy balloons into a full-blown fireball. Now it can be grabbed, dragged, and eventually rolled into other creatures, earning point multipliers for every additional enemy flattened. In short, it plays just like Snow Bros.

Even the powerups are similar, with felled monsters dropping potions for increased speed, longer range projectiles, and stronger attacks. Taking damage removes these buffs, as does grabbing the occasional skull which serves as a sort of anti-enhancement. A mere three hits sends the gravekeeper to his, well, grave, although the game’s arcade-origins means he’s only a quick continue away from resurrection.

Where Nightmare does differentiate itself, however, is in its wonderfully stylized, ghoulish graphics and cool, jazzy soundtrack. Despite all reasoning, the disparate forms gel perfectly together, creating a memorable experience that somehow redeems the derivative mechanics. The five bosses that cap the game’s 25-stage gamut are also a highlight, featuring captivating designs and certain artistic flourishes that far outclass the normal minions. These encounters can also be brutally difficult, absorbing untold quarters from those not playing from an emulator.

In fact, Nightmare’s greatest flaw is not the plagiarism but the unfairness—the hero is simply too slow, his attacks too tepid, to reliably juggle the barrage of enemies and projectiles always swarming from all corners. Forget maximizing points; players will be hard-pressed to merely survive unless they speed through each gamut fast…strategic planning be damned. It’s a problem Snow Bros. also shares, but it’s more a nightmare here.

This is a fun game. A polished game. A game that oozes personality on an almost Tim Burton-scale. Had the same enthusiasm been applied to its underlying fundamentals, this could have stood as an off-kilter, underappreciated classic. Instead, it’s more a reanimated corpse of what’s come before, albeit a strangely attractive one.

And that, of course, might have well been the intention.--D

Nightmare in the Dark - Frankie be Cranky!
Nightmare in the Dark - Frankie be Cranky!
Nightmare in the Dark - Final Boss
Nightmare in the Dark - Final Boss

The art is one of the game's undeniable triumphs, with ebullient bosses and some striking, ghostly backgrounds.

Publisher: SNK

Developer: AM Factory

Release: Jan. 27, 2000

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Pandora's Palace

Platform: Arcade

Pandora's Palace Stage 9
Pandora's Palace Stage 9
Pandora's Palace Box Unlocked!
Pandora's Palace Box Unlocked!

An angelic figure opens the infamous box for unknown reasons, forcing a little Roman dude (apparently an Emperor) to repack the chaos.

Konami is famous for a number of genres. The shooter, the survivor-horror, the stealth game, the Metroidvania—the company has produced some of gaming’s greatest genre classics...just never a worthwhile single-screen platformer. And that's an odd fact considering the existence of Pandora’s Palace, a 1984 SSP that owes more than a passing thanks to Nintendo’s seminal Donkey Kong.

Not that Pandora’s Palace is a soulless copy of the other. After a cryptic opening that sees an angelic figure (Orion?) lifting the lid on the infamous box and releasing a trove of horrors across the (presumed) world, players take control of a little Roman tasked (apparently) with quelling the evils now running free. But rather than a climb up through a gamut of dangers, Pandora sends its players downward. Down past sprouting fires and deadly drops and chomping skulls and herky-jerky springboards, all to reach a door or the hateful crate itself. It’s ultimately an endless, Sisyphus-style quest, the four unique stages simply repeating in more difficult forms until the player burns his last life.

Even by the standards of 1984, Pandora’s gameplay would have seemed quaint, and this perhaps explains its modern ignominy. Indeed, Konami never released the game for any home console, and has rarely (if ever) referenced it since. It thus holds to a curious, tenuous existence, a figment barely remembered despite its experiments in both physics and genre convention. Enemies, for example, are not directly lethal, but act more like pinball bumpers that batter players into other hazards. Platform design is similarly sophisticated, featuring setups more elaborate and lethal than what defines the typical single-screen experience. The one power-up—grapes that beget a set of Roman armor—temporarily upstages the game's defensive emphasis with an overtly offensive stomping ability, and the music is catchy despite being what is essentially a series of chirpy beeps. The title even sports time-based bonus levels and, incidentally, also features Konami’s first use of the Moai (a recurring enemy in many of the company’s franchises, although it looks more like a head-scratching monkey here).

Nevertheless, Pandora’s Palace has been largely lost to that transitional time, unceremoniously disowned by its own developer as scrolling graphics came into vogue. Had it released a year or two earlier, it could have been a mild classic. Now, it’s just an oddity from gaming’s often messy history. But one that, looking back, is still well worth a try.--D

Pandora's Palace Bonus Stage
Pandora's Palace Bonus Stage
Pandora's Palace Moai
Pandora's Palace Moai

The game's vintage flyer proves Pandora really did exist in this reality, being neither a halcyon hallucination nor a hoaxer's bizarre farce.

Publisher: Interlogic

Developer: Konami

Release: 1984

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Pandora's Palace Springy Lifts
Pandora's Palace Springy Lifts
Pandora's Palace Arcade Flyer
Pandora's Palace Arcade Flyer

Bonus levels have the player stomping baddies within a strict time limit.

The grapes grant the Roman hero a nice centurion's set of armor...but no sword. Stomping, not swordplay, is the standard here.

Those wanting to learn more about Pandora's Palace dubious existence are encouraged to check out Hardcore Gaming's essay on it here.

Parasol Stars

Platform: TurboGrafx-16

Parasol Stars Title Screen
Parasol Stars Title Screen
Parasol Stars Mountains and Helicopters
Parasol Stars Mountains and Helicopters

Elemental spheres perpetually sprinkle the stages, waiting to be gathered and tossed at the unsuspecting baddies. Collecting five gels them into a supersized attack perfect for tearing through entire tiers of a stage.

The Bubble Bobble series is oft-regarded as the template for the “modern” single-screen platformer, the typical default reference for anyone describing the genre to others. Certainly, Taito knew it had a hit and wasted no time expanding the franchise into a number of sequels and off-shoots. Some of these follow-ups held true to the original game’s design, upsetting little of the classic formula; others diverged in drastically new directions. Parasol Stars forges a path somewhere between the two extremes.

Subtitled “The Story of Bubble Bobble III,” the game follows the events of Rainbow Islands, a “sequel” that diverged significantly from the original Bubble Bobble gameplay. Parasol Stars takes a half step back, realigning itself more with the first game while remaining mechanically distinct. For better or for worse.

As Bubby (or Bobby, the second player), players must proceed through ten preposterous worlds (8 standard, 2 hidden), battling cutesy enemies by virtue of a parasol—a powerful umbrella than can stun, grab, and throw foes into other baddies. It can also be used to float down chasms, gather elemental powers, and even block incoming attacks. Essentially the game's Swiss Army Knife, it imbues the proceedings with a level of complexity unusual for the genre.

Indeed, brushing the umbrella against a minion leaves it stunned and snatchable, by which the player can then carry it around like an acrobatic plate-spinner. The idea, of course, is to hurl the poor foe into another before it revives, although more points can be gained if it's tossed through a line of other paralyzed shlubs. Juggling orbs of various elemental powers also becomes important, as collecting five of a specific type allows the brothers to unleash a specialized attack. Five “sparks,” for instance, gives the player a chance to hurl a devasting bolt across the screen, while doing the same for water creates a considerable flood, flushing out the riff-raff like fleas off a dog.

If that wasn’t enough, stages are rife with bonus items that sprout in the wake of almost every action. Fruits, desserts, and jewelry are the most common drops and exist solely to inflate the player’s score, but rarer and more weaponized fare, from hearts to bombs to holy crosses, can also be found with a little luck. Moreover, 100-yen coins grant extra continues. Potions grant time-based bonus rounds. Shoes grant increased speed. And that’s just a peek at all the offerings. This constant influx of stuff—some extremely esoteric—mirrors the same quasi-random sensibilities of the original Bubble Bobble. Every playthrough feels a little different.

Each world is based on a specific, if surrealist, theme, from aquatic dreamscapes to a kid’s (apparently) oversized playroom. An equally outrageous boss guards the seventh and final stage of these locations, vulnerable only to the elemental bubbles drifting in the vicinity. Once the eighth world is liberated, the game either concludes with a middling ending, or, had the right secrets been uncovered, provides an additional two worlds. Deducing the “how” and “why” behind these secrets is, in theory, part of the fun. But for a genre that usually prides itself on intuitive, pick-up-and-play experiences, Parasol is strangely obtuse. Even frustrating.

And despite the whimsy, the difficulty is real, with players squished into increasingly crowded and busy levels with abilities that aren’t always useful. The parasol’s mechanics can't just be learned, but must be mastered, and then properly utilized to match stages of a sometimes combative, sometimes puzzle-oriented design. The rote catch-and-toss tactics so effective in the earlier worlds almost become perfunctory by the end.

All this makes Parasol Stars somewhat of an acquired taste, but one that at least stands unique amongst a genre of copycats. It’s a contrarian mishmash of cuddly graphics and cute tunes combined with unapologetic esoterica that some will never fully digest, let alone understand. Yes, it’s good...but also remarkably, incorrigibly weird.

There’s a reason Taito never dredged from this particular well again.--D

Parasol Stars Forest and Unicorns
Parasol Stars Forest and Unicorns
Parasol Stars Dragons and Robots
Parasol Stars Dragons and Robots
Parasol Stars Casinos and Cities
Parasol Stars Casinos and Cities
Parasol Stars  Map Screen
Parasol Stars  Map Screen
Parasol Stars Plesiosaur Boss
Parasol Stars Plesiosaur Boss

The worlds--and the enemies that fill them--are certainly varied. Robots, unicorns, giant anthropomorphic slot machines...Bubby and Bobby better hope their parasols are enough.

Publisher: Taito

Developer: Taito/Working Designs (U.S.)

Release: 1992

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Parasol Stars Bub Boss
Parasol Stars Bub Boss

The "map" showing where the heroes have left to go.

Bosses take an assortment of forms and bear a weakness to a specific element. Above, it's electricity. Below, it's H2O.

Popeye

Platform: Arcade

Popeye Arcade Punching Skulls
Popeye Arcade Punching Skulls
Popeye Arcade Olive Oyl Catching Hearts
Popeye Arcade Olive Oyl Catching Hearts

Olive's love for her man is manifested here in literal form. Should Popeye miss one of her tossed lovestuffs, broken hearts in both the metaphorical and actual sense await.

Donkey Kong, so the lore goes, was once intended to be a Popeye game. Why Nintendo was so fascinated with the Segar/Fleischer property isn’t completely understood, but whatever the case, the company failed to secure the license. Hence the game arcades got instead—one that featured a giant ape and a little man in place of what, presumably, would have been Bluto (the bad guy) tossing barrels at the eponymous sailor. At least, maybe.

But Nintendo did eventually score the license, resulting in a later title that, despite still being a platformer of single-screen intent, offers a radically different experience. Especially in terms of aesthetics. The sprites are bigger, more detailed, and more adept at illustrating their illustrious cartoon counterparts, the famous Popeye, Olive Oyl, and bad-boy Bluto. The latter is especially well depicted, the bumbling bully blundering after Popeye in an array of well-animated and expressive shenanigans. But the gameplay is also unorthodox for the era—while most early ‘80s SSPs focused on “reaching the top,” Popeye follows the “take all the trinkets” route, but even this formula is given an unconventional twist.

Popeye the sailor, being ever smitten with the lovely Olive Oyl, must gallivant across three unique stages, catching his gal’s sweet proclamations of song and love on the first two, and snatching her calls for help on the third. Always perched at the top of the screen, the girl casts her pleas to the arena below in the form of hearts, musical notes, and letters (H-E-L-P). Should the hero fail to nab one of her intentions before it sinks off the screen, Olive's heart is broken and Popeye loses a life. It’s a rather surreal conceit that could only work in such an abstract medium, but work it does, keeping players too busy moving to ever question the sure absurdity.

The bigger threat, of course, is the always pursuing Bluto. While most SSPs depend on multiple enemy-types to maintain a challenge, this game needs only one—Popeye’s rival not only runs and jumps and throws lethal bottles whenever he wants, he can even transcend the “rules” of the game by reaching and stomping between floors. Indeed, it’s not uncommon to be suddenly trounced by the fiend when, a second earlier, he was half-a-screen away. A meta-commentary, perhaps, on the scoundrel’s deceptive, cheating nature?

He’s not completely alone, though. The infamous Sea Hag often materializes between the levels’ tiers, throwing bottles or chomping skulls. And on stage three, vultures occasionally descend, making progression even more precarious. Fortunately, Popeye can bat these hazards back with a well-placed punch. Except Bluto, that is, who’s only vulnerable to Popeye’s crème legere—his infamous spinach. A can of the foodstuff materializes randomly in each stage and grants the sailor brief invincibility. But generally, survival depends on defensive playing, or defensive running, as jumping is a no-go here (an interesting limitation given the genre).

One could call Popeye an exercise in flash over substance. Although the backgrounds are plain and rudimentary, the characters themselves convincingly embody the look and spirit of the old cartoons. The music is also catchy in a basic, two-note sense. But with only three repeating stages of increasing difficulty—stages that are relatively squat and uninteresting to begin with—this is a game best treated like the 6-minute cartoon shorts it’s inspired by. In other words, it's a fun if fleeting diversion into a cartoon world that fails to compel beyond the occasional quarter.

That said, fans of the Popeye franchise will find plenty to like. It’s a game, in truth, really meant for them.--D

Popeye Arcade Level 2 Sea Hag
Popeye Arcade Level 2 Sea Hag
Popeye Arcade Olive Broken Heart
Popeye Arcade Olive Broken Heart
Popeye Arcade Stage 3 Bluto Beaten
Popeye Arcade Stage 3 Bluto Beaten
Popeye Arcade Stage 2 Catching Notes
Popeye Arcade Stage 2 Catching Notes

Publisher: Nintendo

Developer: Nintendo R&D1

Release: 1982

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Popeye Arcade Bucket-head Bluto
Popeye Arcade Bucket-head Bluto

Snarfing some spinach turns Popeye red and capable of giving Bluto the smack-down.

Stage 2 features the entire main Popeye cast, including Wimpy and Swee'Pea. They don't add much to the overall experience, however.

Bluto, always the rascal, "cheats" by reaching below the platform he's on. Here, Popeye is in danger of getting trounced.

The first stage is probably the most fun, featuring relative-free maneuverability and an extra, clever way of putting the stop on Bluto (as shown here).

Saboten Bombers

Platform: Arcade

The single-screen platformer, a genre inherently constrained by its own spatial inhibitions, often relied on bizarre themes and premises to compensate. Whether chasing gorillas up girders or turning pigs into cakes or whapping mushrooms with mallets, it was a style of game often defined by the weird. And Saboten Bombers is the perfect example.

So, the story, or at least the barest suggestion of one, unfolds in a quick scene showing critters—insects and weird plant-like things—apparently overrunning a house. On a window sill, two tiny cacti stand watch before uprooting themselves and hobbling after the interlopers. What then transpires is a 100-stage battle for the home, the cacti traveling from room to room and bombing the pests out of existence.

Yes, the two cacti attack by lobbing bombs at their foes. These bombs will bounce and ricochet around, attaching themselves to any enemy in their path before finally exploding. The more enemies snagged and popped in a single toss brings, naturally, a greater score. It’s not unlike the typical Snow Bros. “bowl them over” dynamic, except here the bomb is as deadly to the player as it is to the creatures. Indeed, the bombs are such a liability, what with their swift, unpredictable trajectories and considerable explosions, they could be deemed the game’s most dangerous enemy.

Not that the usual bad guys are pushovers. Well, some are—Saboten’s foes are unique to other games in that they’re harmless when not attacking. This means the game’s initial critter, a weak starfish-like thing, can be literally pushed around the screen with little retaliation. Moreover, an artful stomp can bring most baddies to a stop, allowing players to corral multiple creeps for an explosive payoff. It’s a subtle collection of mechanics that soon becomes forgotten in an ever-mounting din of incinerations and increasing difficulty. Before long, enemies start respawning in waves, begin taking multiple hits to defeat, and get progressively aggressive with their own explosives, searing the screen in disorienting napalm. All this set against a punishing time limit...even survival becomes a hardship. Those aiming for some fancy high score chains are in for a struggle.

Interspersed between the domestic destruction are competitive stages in which the two cacti duel to the death, flinging bombs until only one remains. Here, a layer of strategy is also presumed, but in reality, matches quickly devolve into a screen of ping-ponging bombs. The bosses are more interesting, appearing on every tenth room. From giant hornets to weird, bulbous birds, these bouts are fun if sometimes overtly frustrating.

Indeed, the game’s whimsy belies a brutal sensibility, with most players likely giving up long before the 100th level is ever reached. Powerups, including speed and bomb enhancements, do little to prevent the next inevitable death. In fact, the best item is a blue flower that appears wherever the player was last defeated. Grabbing the item instantly cleans the screen of all enemies—even bosses!—and always reappears at the next misstep. It’s as if the developers knew their game hadn’t been properly fine-tuned and, rather than fixing those deficiencies, simply inserted this to artificially alleviate the body count.

These problems are regrettable for a game that, thanks to its cheeky nature, well-crafted graphics, and slick animation, makes a good first impression— a mix of Snow Bros. with a whisk of Bomberman, plus its own secret ingredient. But that initial enchantment soon withers to what becomes a repetitive grind; there’s no elegance to the mechanics, no sense of real progression, no satisfying or practical strategy. No style. Bombs are thrown. Bombs explode. Bombs dominate everything and, some might say, even undermine the entire experience by the end. It’s "rock-paper-scissors" without the rock, in other words.

And "bomb-paper-scissors," naturally, can only end in oblivion.--D

Saboten's environs are well-drawn and varied, even if the stages themselves play largely the same.

Falling enemies can leave the cacti seeing stars.

Bosses are also diverse, although they soon begin repeating (albeit in more difficult forms).

Later level designs force players to devise techniques not immediately obvious, such as "bomb-jumping" up walls.

The game's ending, for those few who reach it, suggest a sequel that never came. Or, more mundanely, it might simply be referring to the 'XX' levels that follow after the 100th.

Publisher: Tecmo

Developer: NMK

Release: 1992

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Snow Bros.

Platform: Amiga

Did these three receive help from the illustrious Sonic Team?!

Later backgrounds feel rushed, generic, almost place-holderish--maybe due to the game's dubious release status.

Defeating the boss of every tenth stage reveals a nice splash interstitial showcasing the next boss.

The "not-at-all self-congratulatory" main team. Although, to be fair, their adaptation is quite good.

The single-screen platformer often got slighted on consoles, appearing only in dribs and drabs across different systems. Not so with the home computer, however. A number of SSPs, from Rod-Land to Bubble Bobble, got numerous PC adaptations. And for Snow Bros., this Amiga version is especially interesting.

Namely for its story, which, like many Snow Bros. adaptations, opens in strict contradiction to the others. This time, there are no princes turned into snowmen, no Satan or King Scorch on the attack, no accursed sun that must be thawed. Rather, a girl is simply snatched from her cozy European village by an inexplicable monster—the game’s first boss. But God is kind (there’s even a Christian church in the background), casting down a lightning bolt on an unremarkable little snowman. This brings the little tyke to life, from which he then capers after the girl.

It’s an elegant opening to what’s an otherwise straightforward port—accurate and, on the surface, almost identical to its arcade counterpart. Players hop their heroes across platforms, lob shots at baddies until they’re packed into snowballs, and then cast them down at other critters. What’s different is the difficulty; offering both an easy and a hard mode, the game is much more generous with the extra lives than in other versions, giving everyone a realistic hope at reaching the game’s self-reverential ending. After showing the rescued girl hopping with her snow bro amidst an uncannily sunny valley, a long and ostentatious credits sequence rolls; here, the programmer’s skill in warping and scaling the game’s enemy sprites is put on display. And if that showboating isn’t enough, the game’s three key team members then appear as garish caricatures of themselves, an affectation meant more to service their egos than reward the player.

But developer pretensions aside, this is a fine rendition of the classic game. A few liberties are taken-- the process of spelling “snow” for a 1-up chance has been greatly simplified, completing every tenth floor now yields a spiffy piece of boss art, and some of the backgrounds for the upper floors seem oddly generic (rushed?) when compared to the originals. But for fans lacking access to the arcade game, this is an impressively faithful adaptation, offering the core experience without the bloat of other ports. No more, no less.

Unless one counts that scary credits scroll.--D

Publisher: Toaplan

Developer: Ocean

Release: No official release?

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

The opening, although somewhat nonsensical, offers a narrative elegance lacking in the other versions. That Snowman will soon be granted life...

Snow Bros.

Platform: Sega Mega Drive

Snow Bros. Mega Drive Cutscene - Devil be Mad
Snow Bros. Mega Drive Cutscene - Devil be Mad
Snow Bros. Mega Drive: Princess' Turn
Snow Bros. Mega Drive: Princess' Turn
Snow Bros. Mega Drive Princesses and Blushes
Snow Bros. Mega Drive Princesses and Blushes

So, the story: princesses get nabbed, then rescued, then are left to play savior for their now kidnapped snowman companions. And judging from the bottom picture, the foursome shares an interesting relationship...

Snow Bros. and Minions?
Snow Bros. and Minions?

The artwork is still weird...is that a Minion in the background?

Snow Bros. Mega Drive Princess Fights Back
Snow Bros. Mega Drive Princess Fights Back

The new levels have Puripuri and Puchipuchi playing the heroines. It's somewhat inexplicable, but their cute sprites are definitely an improvement over the vanilla brothers'.

Snow Bros. Mega Drive Princess Against Robots
Snow Bros. Mega Drive Princess Against Robots

The new levels' artwork is also peculiar. Why is everything here now set in a futuristic corridor/hangar? Is this a metaphor for the devil's undying influence through the ages?

Snow Bros. Mega Drive Princess v. Satan?
Snow Bros. Mega Drive Princess v. Satan?

The final boss--unlike King Scorch from the NES version, this foe's true identity isn't as easily confirmed. But if sources are to be believed, he's the literal devil himself.

Despite being a reasonably popular arcade game, Snow Bros. never received much support for the home. While fans might recall the somewhat obscure NES and Game Boy editions, owners of the Sega Genesis or Super Nintendo were left in the proverbial cold. It was a 16-bit game destined for an 8-bit screen, it seemed, like a vibrant Technicolor movie shown through a black and white TV. Disgraceful!

Unless one lived in Japan. Here, owners of the Sega Mega Drive (Genesis) got what many consider to be the game’s definitive edition—a convincing 16-bit conversion of the arcade hit that retains its feel and aesthetic. It also offers a load of new content; whereas the arcade game nixed the context in true “just-put-the-quarter-in!” style, the home port actually gives, to some degree, some semblance of a story. As told in the opening cutscene, two princesses are playing with their snowman pals when a demon (Satan?) appears overhead, overtaking the daytime sky. He swiftly snatches the two girls away, forcing the brothers to chase him (apparently) to the jagged tower drawn far into the background.

That’s one version of events, anyway. The NES game offers a rather different account involving a certain “King Scorch” who nabs the girls while transforming human princes Nick and Tom into the iconic snowmen. The 2022 remake offers yet a different telling, basing itself mostly on the NES story but switching out Scorch for “King Artich,” a fiend who, despite the name, fights while riding atop a giant fire-breathing chicken… (A cockatrice?)

More significant, however, is the Mega Drive version’s ending—once floor fifty is beaten, the princesses are rescued only for Nick and Tom to be nabbed in their place, leaving the damsels beating their breasts and forced to pursue. Yes, in a table-turning twist, players now take command of princess Puripuri or Puchipuchi for the game’s extra twenty floors, both of whom are somehow endowed with the exact snow-flinging powers. It makes little sense (and is likely why the remake adopts the NES account), but the girls’ sprite work is nice and the twenty new levels are fun enough. (Editor's note: Per info gained from a Snow Bros. fan, the Japanese manual explains the opening events a bit more sensically.)

Everything else, of course, is much the same as the arcade. The rules, based on gravity and trajectory, involve packing enemies into snowballs and then rolling them down platforms into other foes. It’s a mechanic that makes instant, intuitive sense; a natural fit for a genre based on 4:3 boundaries. Only a harsh difficulty—partly due to unfair platform traps and some incorrigible bosses—harm the overall fun factor. The password feature is a godsend.

So, it’s a good game…but is this iteration of Snow Bros. the definitive version, beating even the arcade original? Its (slightly) more forgiving challenge and extra content certainly suggest as much, but it remains a frustrating climb all the same; the twenty extra floors only make it harder. By contrast, the NES offers a more approachable challenge and, for those who care, a superior story.

Whichever version one opts for, always bring a friend! It’s the crisscrossing, zigzagging teamwork that kept people playing back in the day, ensuring those princesses actually got saved…and granting the game that timeless sense of exuberance still so compelling today.--D

Publisher: Tengen

Developer: Toaplan

Release: 1993

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Snow Bros.

Platform: NES

Snow Bros. NES Second Boss
Snow Bros. NES Second Boss

The square "wells" above are essentially traps--the player can't easily escape once falling into one. And it's really easy falling into one.

Snow Bros. NES King Scorch Cutscene
Snow Bros. NES King Scorch Cutscene

A cinema scene shows "King Scorch" nabbing one of the princesses. Oddly, he's not featured in the game itself.

Bubble Bubble might be the foremost representative of the single-screen platformer, but Snow Bros. carries more of its soul. After its release in 1990, the genre became inescapably influenced by the game’s mechanics and sensibilities; Tumble Pop, Saboten Bombers, Nightmare in the Dark…it’s hard not to find a succeeding one-screen platformer that doesn’t crib something from the Snow Bros. dynamic.

Which is not surprising; the game is fun. As snow siblings Nick or Tom, players must progress through 50-stages of hopping and snow-throwing, using gravity to their advantage. Indeed, the game’s genius comes in its core mechanic—pack an enemy into a snowball (really, snow boulder), then bowl him down the screen at other enemies for powerups and big points. Savvy players, learning the nooks of every level and understanding their foes’ behavior, can turn each arena into an almost Rube Goldberg-style machine, toppling henchmen from every corner of the map. It’s here where the game truly satisfies. The aforementioned powerups also heighten the fun by adding some much-needed speed to the heroes’ normally stodgy movements, plus strengthening and lengthening the efficacy of their projectiles.

Further variety comes with the bosses, who guard the chamber of every tenth stage. Some of these battles are fun; some, especially the dual-birds of level 30, come packed with unfair attacks that only repeated practice can realistically overcome. Level design, unfortunately, begins to feel repetitive as the game climbs into its final floors, with platforms placed in ways to intentionally trap the player while enemies descend for easy kills. As before, these moments don’t seem especially fair, and certainly snuff some of the fun found in the earlier stages.

Fans of the arcade original will find this NES port extra interesting, as Capcom/Soft House definitely took some liberties in its story and framing. The brothers, the game now explains, were once human princes before being cursed by the evil demon, King Scorch. This added context is both welcome but weird…considering the demon never appears during actual play. Nevertheless, the game’s mechanics, graphics, and sound all match the arcade in authentic, if undeniably 8-bit, fashion. A faithful, impressive conversion, overall.

But is it the best single-screen platformer on the system? Or, rather, of all-time? Being influential doesn’t always mean being the best, but for fans of the genre or those with an NES fetish, this is one cartridge (or ROM) well worth seeking out.--D

Publisher: Capcom

Developer: Soft House/Toaplan

Release: November 1991

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Snow Bros. (Jr)

Platform: Game Boy

Snow Bros. Jr.
Snow Bros. Jr.
Snow Bros. Game Boy Ancient Tablet
Snow Bros. Game Boy Ancient Tablet
Snow Bros. Game Boy Boss Tablet
Snow Bros. Game Boy Boss Tablet
Snow Bros. Game Boy Ancient Tablet Legend
Snow Bros. Game Boy Ancient Tablet Legend
Snow Bros. Game Boy Boss Tablet
Snow Bros. Game Boy Boss Tablet

Interestingly, this version eschews the typical "save-the-damsel" narrative for a more cryptic focus on the snow brother's world and primordial mythologies. As shown above, each time a boss is defeated, a tablet of prophetic import is acquired.

Snow Bros. Game Boy New Levels
Snow Bros. Game Boy New Levels

The ten new levels play like the others, but are harder to manage due to enemies that can now warp around the chambers at will, firing in any direction.

Snow Bros. Jr (Snow Bros. in North America) would have been better labeled “Snow Brother,” as only one snowman takes the stage in this adventure. Whether due to the Game Boy’s processor limitations or just the impracticality of offering cooperative play on a handheld device, Nick (Tom?) must climb the game’s fifty floors alone—not to save two winsome princesses, but his own kidnapped twin. Once the bro is rescued, ten bonus levels unfold, culminating in a battle against the sun itself.

It’s a weird story—one told through cryptic interludes spliced between the game’s six boss fights. Perhaps the manual explains more, but judging from the cutscenes alone, the sun seems to have lost its heart—becoming, well, heartless in its treatment of the world below. And who better to snuff out a star’s burning tyranny than a frosty snowman? It’s an odd if obvious metaphor, but one that at least grants the game some distinction over its console and arcade counterparts.

Otherwise, the experience in largely the same, just sloooowwwer…Nick seems to move at half speed compared to other versions, and he isn’t particularly quick in those, either. He also attacks more slowly, firing only two shots at once before the following “reload.” This intermittent delay doesn’t affect the mechanics much, but does rob the gameplay of that signature “zest” so intrinsic to the original’s appeal. Nevertheless, the proceedings still work as expected—first pack enemies into snowballs and roll them down into other foes, then collect the points and power-ups they leave behind. The original five bosses also return, albeit in less formidable form; players who struggled with other Snow Bros. adaptations might appreciate Jr's more manageable challenge.

Perhaps inevitably, Snow Bros.’s arcade, Mega Drive, and NES incarnations render this port all but irrelevant. Jr is simply slower, drabber, and less refined than its bigger brothers found on other formats. But, for diehard fans clamoring for yet another retelling of a game that originated with no story at all, this is worth a curious playthrough.--D

Snow Bros. Jr. Game Boy First Boss
Snow Bros. Jr. Game Boy First Boss

The original bosses return for this pea-soup retread, although they're not quite as brutal.

Snow Bros. Jr. Bonus Game
Snow Bros. Jr. Bonus Game

A bonus level is offered after every ten floors. It's as inconsequential as it looks, however.

Publisher: Capcom U.S.A., Inc.

Developer: Toaplan Co., Ltd.

Release: January 1992

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Sonic the Hedgehog

Platform: Master System

Second only to Nintendo’s Super Mario in terms of mainstream recognition, Sonic is the rare ‘90s video game franchise that has survived the climes of modern times, handedly outlasting his rascally mascot contemporaries as the years turned into decades. Even Sega, the Blue Blur’s corporate originators, has floundered where the hedgehog hasn’t; it often seems Sega lives on because of Sonic, not the reverse.

But for all his fame, the hero’s early history is still largely framed within his 16-bit games: Sonic the Hedgehog 1-3, Sonic and Knuckles, and Sonic CD. These fabled five are held in a kind of fond, reverential awe, the earliest accounts on record for the hedgehog’s considerable lore—a veritable, interactive Torah ofor the Sonic faithful. But Sonic was more than a 16-bit experience; Master System and Game Gear owners received a somewhat divergent gospel, a separate series of games both similar to their upscale counterparts, yet strikingly distinct. Games that, today, are deemed more apocryphal than appreciated.

Indeed, this rendition of "Sonic the Hedgehog," the first in a series of 8-bit games released across the Game Gear and Master System platforms, offers a different interpretation of the usual creed. In the 16-bit releases, stages were multi-tiered and beckoned exploration. Speed was paramount, platforming was secondary. There were inexplicable loop-de-loops and meta-pinball wizardry and floating mazes that spun against cascades of falling birds and neon fish. It was an exercise in flash over substance, some might say. But really, the games were simply a journey into the surreal—dynamic works of abstraction that compelled all who played.

But this 8-bit scripture paints a different picture, offering a game more straightforward, more linear, more deliberate. Here, precision platforming is better emphasized; tiered-exploration is rare. Environments are less exotic, more mundane—generically-devised “Bridge” and “Jungle” locales now join the more thematically rich Green Hill and Labyrinth Zones. Progression feels more utilitarian with presentation favoring function over form. Only the bonus rounds, with their bouncy, bumper-heavy, physics-defying antics, match the whimsy of the Mega Drive original.

The Sonic the Hedgehog series became a hit because of its 16-bits—this 8-bit retelling, no matter how clever or faithful, could never hope to overtake the preeminent edition. Unlike the competition between Super Mario 3 and Super Mario World, wherein the former could live, for a time, without facing an immediate replacement, Master System Sonic enjoyed no such luxury. It appeared not before, but amidst a graphical renaissance, and was thus ushered into instant irrelevancy. Gamers wanted the future, and Master System Sonic was but an inconsequential demake long before the term even existed.

But that was then. 8-bit graphics are now an aesthetic--an artistic choice--and Sonic is bigger than ever. If not a classic, this unsung romp remains a happy addendum to the hedgehog’s heritage, and fans owe it another chance.

As does Sega. If there's any justice, the company will do a Sonic Origins 2 dedicated directly to Sonic's full 8-bit legacy. The faithful should demand nothing less.--D

Sonic the Hedgehog Master System - Bonus Level
Sonic the Hedgehog Master System - Bonus Level

The game's bonus level sees a radical redesign from the 16-bit rendition--although the goal still involves "reaching the end," it's more about handling the tricky spring-physics than navigating a spinning maze.

Both versions still share a decidedly lethargic Sonic when moving uphill from after a complete standstill.

The Chaos Emeralds return for a total of six. This time, they must be found in the levels themselves.

Sonic the Hedgehog Master System - The Bridge
Sonic the Hedgehog Master System - The Bridge

Unlike its 16-bit counterpart, this version of Sonic provides an attractive map of Sonic's homeworld. Sega would later include a 3-D rendition of this same scene in 2022's Sonic Origins.

In one instance, the stage even scrolls vertically for a time. A missed jump means defeat.

Publisher: Sega

Developer: Ancient

Release: October 25, 1991

Genre: Platformer

Super Mario Land

Platform: Game Boy

Although no mainline Mario game is truly obscure, there is one title many flippantly disregard or simply overlook—the endearingly simple, or infamously basic, Super Mario Land.

At first glance, the game seems deceptively like the original Super Mario Bros. The graphics bear a similar likeness, the mechanics are largely the same, the levels are still overly linear, and even backtracking is kept impossible. Indeed, in a certain sense, it’s the original’s true sequel.

But there’s a strangeness, an almost eerie, unseemly feeling, that pervades the experience. Like chomping into an apple that’s gone a little too soft, or a banana that seems a little too brown. Here, Mario’s journey is a cascade of gray. Koopas (called Nobokons here) explode when stomped. Robots march along the seashore while flying saucers serve for trees in the background. Fireballs have been replaced with “Superballs” that bounce once and then fly uselessly into the air. Moai statues bounce and pounce like springs. Bowser has been replaced by an alien (Tatanga). Even the princess isn’t the same. (Hi, I’m Daisy!)

In short, the game feels oddly off-brand, as if contracted to a third-party that didn’t fully understand the property, or like a random fangame that veered into the weird. And those intuitions are not altogether wrong…

Super Mario games were usually the product of series creator Shigeru Miyamoto and his R&D4 development team. But circa 1988, another division, R&D1, was scurrying to develop the Game Boy handheld and its initial lineup of titles; wanting an easy showcase of the system’s abilities, Nintendo president Hiroshi Yamauchi told the team to design a Mario platformer. Look, scrolling graphics! Lots of moving characters! Catchy music! Genre-blending gameplay! And so, Super Mario Land was born—not from the hands of Miyamoto’s team, but from the Game Boy group only vaguely familiar with the series’ canon and mythos. Ultimately, R&D1 made whatever game it wanted, using only the first Super Mario Bros. as a reference.

Which explains, of course, the slight cognitive dissonance many experience when playing the game, that familiar but slightly off-putting feeling as Mario grabs an invincibility star or dives down a pipe or rides atop a hopping boulder. The question, then, is whether these differences, some more subtle than others, improve or detract from the overall experience.

Fortunately, the passage of time has been kind to this one.

No doubt, Super Mario Land was popular in its day, but it also had the advantage of being a launch game for an exciting new novelty. As years passed, Mario’s first Game Boy adventure quickly became dismissed in light of better titles, whether designed for the handheld or its bigger console brothers. That dismissal eventually became derision, with critics retroactively declaring the title as too short, too quirky, too inconsequential. And they weren’t altogether wrong.

But today, where so many Mario games feel cut from the same, blasé template, when the franchise’s last major new villain was Wario from 1992 (thanks to Land’s sequel, no less!), when other experimental off-shoots like Super Princess Peach and the Wario Land series have been left to languish if not outright die…Mario Land’s distortions of the traditional formula now seem daring, even brilliant. Mario in a submarine, blasting marine life? Fun! Mario in a biplane dogfighting aliens? Weird…but fun! The four kingdoms themselves set in real-life locations, from Egypt (Birabuto) to China (Chai)? Neat!

Modern Mario games could use a sliver of this unabashed kookiness.

The good news is that the unseemly hijinks continued, somewhat, in Super Mario Land 2; the sadness is that Nintendo eventually abandoned the (2-D) Land games and timeline altogether (a few nods in Mario Maker 2 notwithstanding), saving only Wario and Daisy before never looking back. Two characters got spared, but not the series’ quintessential quirk—an ingredient that makes Super Mario Land ever-special over the passage of time, a symbol of an era in which games were crafted with a more freehand approach and corporate rule didn’t dictate all.

It’s hard not to yearn for the old Nintendo.--D

Supeer Mario Land - 3-3 Boss
Supeer Mario Land - 3-3 Boss

Boss fights are simple but serve their purpose.

Super Mario Land - Submarine Atlantis
Super Mario Land - Submarine Atlantis
Super Mario Land - Attacking Tatanga
Super Mario Land - Attacking Tatanga

Stages 2-3 and 4-3 are horizontal shooters. Pretty fun ones, too.

Flying saucer trees?

Super Mario Land - Saving Daisy
Super Mario Land - Saving Daisy

Aww, but that's Luigi's girl...right?

Publisher: Nintendo (R&D1)

Developer: Nintendo

Release: July 1989

Genre: Platformer

Tumblepop

Platform: Arcade

Tumble Pop: Jesus Watching
Tumble Pop: Jesus Watching

The single-screen platformer is rife with classics and also-rans. Taito gave us the genre-defining Bubble Bobble. Toaplan gave us the seminal Snow Bros. And Data East gave us Tumblepop, a game as generic as its mishmash of a name implies.

Well, that’s not entirely fair. Though the plot is almost non-existent, and the game’s twin heroes distinctly unremarkable, its primary mechanic doesn’t actually suck. Well, it does, but in a good way—by inhaling enemies into an overpowered vacuum (think Ghostbusters or Luigi’s Mansion), the player can then spew them back at other attackers. Inhaling multiple baddies in a single go releases an even more rapacious discharge that then ping-pongs across the screen, piercing through the remaining foes. It’s a dynamic doubtlessly cribbed from Snow Bros., but with an important distinction; more than just being stunned and tossed, baddies can now be momentarily held, carried, and dispensed at will. It might seem incidental, but this added wrinkle makes for a faster, brasher, more dynamic game.

Indeed, the vacuum might even be too powerful. Its reach is generous, capable of yanking foes and items through walls and other obstacles. Skilled players can literally bound about the screen, sucking up the stage’s inhabitants and collecting their spoils before the time limit has barely budged. And really, they're compelled to, as the enemies can only be held for so long before breaking free for further mischief. Baddies flattened by an attack will either drop point-granting baubles, the occasional speed, range, and strength-boosting upgrade, or a random letter--spelling “Tumplepop,” triggers a cursory bonus stage.

As for why these two kids are battling clowns, ghosts, robots, and other such monsters, the game never directly explains. In a nod, perhaps, to Jules Verne’s Around the World in Eighty Days, the scamps travel to eight unique spots across the globe, vacuuming monsters as if everything were self-evident. Once the planet has been cleansed, they head into outer space for another two rounds of battle. A mad scientist-type attacks, loses, and well…the end. Congratulations.

A dull aesthetic reinforces this flimsy narrative, imposing its milquetoast heroes against a swath of bland backdrops. Players will visit such illustrious locales as Rio and France, but most will hardly notice. The enemies are no better, feeling inconsistent with their environments as if snipped from a different game. The ten bosses are more memorable but, at best, only vaguely represent their homelands. Moreover, the animation is merely serviceable, the stages overly crowded and compact, and the music, although catchy, is really just the main theme remixed nine separate times. All this, combined with the already derivative gameplay, leaves Tumblepop feeling like a churn n’ burn release—a hastily spun confection originally intended to fill the gap between bigger, more prestigious titles.

But, it’s still fun. And very accessible. And the difficulty curve is much fairer than some its more famed single-screen competitors. It might lack the overall warmth and charisma that made, say, Bubble Bobble an instant classic, but as a rushed introduction to the genre, Tumblepop might just be the easiest way in.--D

Tumble Pop Russian Clowns
Tumble Pop Russian Clowns
Tumble Pop Meets Caveman Ninjas
Tumble Pop Meets Caveman Ninjas

Joe and Mac characters? An interesting foreshadowing, indeed...

Interstitial cutscenes add to the fun. Right?

Publisher: Leprechaun Inc.

Developer: Data East

Release: 1991

Genre: Single-screen Platformer

Enemies, at best, only vaguely connote the lands they represent.

Boss battles can be fun...

...despite their thematic problems.

Bonus stages offer more of the same. Vacuum that loot...and scoot!

Virtual Boy Wario Land

Platform: Virtual Boy

Virtual Boy Wario Land: Into the Woods
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Into the Woods

What defines Mario? His early hijinks with Donkey Kong? His later face-offs with Bowser? Or, later still, his rivalry with a certain mischievous doppelganger—that twisted caricature known as Wario?

Indeed, it’s the latter personage that really swelled and held sway in the latter 1990s. By then, Donkey Kong had become largely divorced from the plumber’s proceedings with his own Donkey Kong Country line of games. Bowser had also become scarce, if only because the mainline Mario game itself had become rare; after Super Mario World’s debut in 1990, there wouldn’t be another conventional entry into the series until 1996’s Super Mario 64. After that, it’d be another six-year gap until Super Mario Sunshine dawned in 2002.

But though the ‘90s proved to be a strange furlough for the hero, Mario’s presence was still felt through a similar, yet very different character. Needing an antagonist for their Super Mario Land 2 Game Boy project, Nintendo’s R&D1 team conceived of a figure both manly but gross, both pathetic but majestic…a jealous, cantankerous soul who nevertheless still possessed a kind of charm. Wario was the subverted, inverted version of Mario, and thus, was the perfect rival and foil. So much so, he even transcended his nemesis for a time, receiving his own “Wario Land” series of games that offered, like the twisted character himself, an alternate—even subverted—take on the Mario ethos.

Nintendo was a different company in those heady 1990s, stitched by a patchwork of teams defined by their own visions and design predilections. Wario was the culmination of this more free-form era in which corporate oversight was minimized, where company-wide homogeneity hadn’t yet become the overriding maxim. As Nintendo rolled through its NES, SNES, and N64 platforms, the humble Game Boy remained in the background, staid but safe, and thus left protected by the would-be meddlers on Nintendo’s higher floors. Such freedom fueled R&D1’s creative drive, helping it realize a number of properties, spin-offs, and sequels marked with a certain “quirk” often missing from Nintendo’s more mainline, high-profile titles. Wario, himself unscrupulous and unorthodox, was born from this versatile, less-reverent machine.

It’s no coincidence, then, that modern Nintendo has been resistant to creating more wacky, tacky properties, both within Mario’s universe and without. The plumber’s persistent roster of bad-boy adversaries has remained consistent since Wario’s introduction in 1992; with the possible exception of Bowser Jr., Bowser, Donkey Kong, and Wario still comprise Mario’s main bevy of baddies. Except…Wario now takes a distant third in the trio, excluded while both Bowser and DK feature prominently in The Super Mario Bros. Movie, at the Nintendo World theme parks, and in several high-profile games. Wario, who once starred with Mario, Luigi, and Yoshi in Super Mario 64 DS, who once got games like Wario World and Wario Land: Shake it!, has now been minimized to WarioWare sequels and appearances in various Mario-themed sports and multiplayer games.

Why the sudden apathy for a character who once, in lieu of a proper 1990s Mario sequel, gave gamers their platforming, brick-busting fix? Money, probably—it’s clear that Wario games don’t sell in the numbers of the great Super Mario. But another reason might just be one of jealousy; after all, the greedy, garlic-crunching anti-hero wasn’t the brainchild of the esteemed Shigeru Miyamoto, but the invention of the now dismantled R&D1. Clearly, Miyamoto wants his own creation—the also brawny, irascible Donkey Kong—to be at the forefront of the company’s legacy. In his eyes, Wario, that weird pretender from the ‘90s, is barely official.

But no matter. Wario has his fans, and all six of his leading games are excellent in their way: Wario Land - Super Mario Land 3, Virtual Boy Wario Land, Wario Land 2, Wario Land 3, Wario Land 4, and Wario Land - Shake It! The most obscure of these, however, is the Virtual Boy effort, a game that would have surely become a classic had its platform not died so tragically, so fast.

Wario Land VB is actually the second game released in the six-strong series, being essentially a direct follow-up to the “Super Mario Land 3” Game Boy original where Mario was dumped for a heavier, crunchier, more hard-hitting star. Where Mario ran like an Olympian, jumped like an acrobat, and fell like a feather…Wario plodded, Wario thumped, Wario battered--Wario would rather bully his way through obstacles than hurdle them. Mario followed the preset path while Wario forged his own.

Fans can debate whether this slower approach trumps Mario’s more agile own, but it did befit the poor Game Boy screen, which in its original incarnation was prone to severe blurring whenever a character dared a little speed. Wario plodded while Mario jogged, trotted while Mario sprinted. In a sense, Wario’s creation was one of circumstance.

The game was fun, too, offering a unique take on the then-tired platforming experience that so defined both the 8 and 16-bit generations. Even now, as of 2024, there isn’t a platformer that quite feels like Wario, that quite captures the satisfying crunch and smash as he charges into walls or butts a helpless enemy off the screen. It’s brutal. It’s fun. It’s Wario unleashed.

The Game Boy title’s success soon spawned a clever successor for Nintendo’s ailing Virtual Boy. The better hardware, despite the tacky red on black, gave Wario a level of detail and animation that even surpassed the Mario games of the time. The gameplay got less of an upgrade—Wario still attacks by shoulder-ramming himself into a host of obnoxious enemies as he avoids traps and uncovers treasures. The same powerups also return; the eagle hat allows Wario to zip through the air in a limited bee-line of flight, the dragon hat gives him a flame-thrower enemy-torcher, and the bull hat greatly enhances the brute’s shoulder charge. The “King Dragon Hat,” which combines elements of the other three enhancements, can also be attained…making Wario’s foes a cinch to incinerate.

And, in another curious holdover from the Mario games, Wario shrinks, crinkling into a pint-sized tyke when struck by a foe. It’s an odd phenomenon that begs the question regarding who Wario really is—a brazen muscleman or a pint-sized dwarf? Future Wario games, just like the later 3-D Mario titles, would remove the growing/shrinking dynamic altogether. Here, it remains an awkward stumble in the character’s evolution.

Where Wario Land VB does does truly excel over its predecessor is in its art direction, trading the somewhat cutesy, Mario-esque proceedings of the first game with something decidedly creepier. Sharks attack not with open jaws, but with chainsaws jutting from their eye sockets. Grimy, spear-wielding ogres patrol the trenches of stench-drenched sewers. Phantom masks weave dangerously and deviously through galleries of haunted art. Yes, the game is unorthodox even by series’ own twisted standards.

The VB’s infamous red on black graphics certainly enhance (exacerbate?) these grim proceedings, making one wonder if the system’s ghastly two-tone array might have subconsciously influenced the developer’s nightmarish direction. Indeed, Wario shifts through the game’s fourteen stages as if slowly ascending from hell itself, riding an elevator up level after level with the occasional boss waiting in-between. These guardians are devils themselves—feisty confrontations far more taxing than the traditional Mario boss encounter. And once the entire 14-floor gauntlet is complete, a “good” ending still isn’t guaranteed. Certain conditions must be met for Wario to keep his treasures and find a proper way home.

Of course, the game also flirts with the system’s “virtual” elements—that 3D-depth effect showcased here by casting Wario between background and foreground via specialized tiles. Although not exactly revolutionary, this shifting between planes offers an added element of exploration that, years later, would be used in everything from Donkey Kong Country Returns to Super Mario Bros. Wonder. If the Virtual Boy died without leaving a legacy, at least one of its games still proved influential.

Which is also why Virtual Boy Wario Land stands as the most tragic entry of the series, abandoned to a doomed platform with no hint of rerelease. The 3DS would have been the perfect system to reclaim and remaster this lost treasure, but Nintendo seems happy to let the title die. The VB was an embarrassment in the company’s eyes. And the games—even the good ones—are just reminders that even the mighty Nintendo is fallible.

The future of Wario remains unclear; he lacks a champion at Nintendo headquarters to resurrect his cause, to remind people why, once upon a time, he was a convincing alternative to the plumber. Now, he’s the microgame-collection guy, with all recollection of his glorious past relegated to spotty rereleases of his Game Boy titles. Virtual Boy Wario Land is good. System-defining. Even system-redeeming. It's the product of great talent and great love. And yet, it’s a love that no longer exists at corporate Nintendo.

Consider this one lost.--D

Virtual Boy Wario Land: Ball From Afar
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Ball From Afar
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Ball Up Close
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Ball Up Close
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Title Screen
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Title Screen
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Jump Pads Back n' Forth
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Jump Pads Back n' Forth

Wario moves between the two planes of play via specific jump pads. This front/rear dynamic would be later revisited in everything from Donkey Kong Country Returns to Super Mario Bros. Wonder.

Publisher: Nintendo

Developer: Nintendo (R&D1)

Release: 1995

Genre: Platformer

Virtual Boy Wario Land: Flame Blocks
Virtual Boy Wario Land: Flame Blocks
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Bounding into the Background
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Bounding into the Background
Virtual Boy Wario Land: King Dragon Hat
Virtual Boy Wario Land: King Dragon Hat
Virtual Boy Wario Land: First Boss
Virtual Boy Wario Land: First Boss
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Final Boss
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Final Boss
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Creepy, Chainsaw Sharks
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Creepy, Chainsaw Sharks
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Hearts and Diamonds Bonus Game
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Hearts and Diamonds Bonus Game
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Treasure Room Lucky Cat
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Treasure Room Lucky Cat
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Treasure Inventory
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Treasure Inventory
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Bonus Game Rooms
Virtual Boy Wario Land - Bonus Game Rooms

Being a Virtual Boy game, Wario Land has its share of 3-D effects and gimmicks, including this spiked ball which sways in and out of the background/foreground.

Similar to games like Metroid, certain blocks cannot be destroyed without the proper item or power. The so-called King Dragon Hat combines all three of Wario's usual powerups.

Wario Land's bosses prove unusually tricky to fell compared to the typical Mario game. Players will likely fail on their first few tries.

The game is undeniably creepy on occasion, as the mask-wearing, chainsaw-out-the-eye sharks clearly indicate.

Bonus games are available in-between stages, hosted by an inexplicable beaver. The "heart" game involves Wario using jump pads to spring back-and-forth, collecting hearts and diamonds as they fly from right to left.

A key must be procured to complete each level, but ten treasures must be found to achieve the best ending. The coins collected and playtime spent also contributes to the specific conclusion players will receive.